Sekiro: Where Your Sen Goes When You Die (Besides Your Grave)
Ah, Sekiro. A game where death is just a minor inconvenience (and a major loss of dignity). But fear not, Shinobi of Questionable Spending Habits! For even with your inevitable demises, your hard-earned sen doesn't have to follow you to the spirit realm. Let's delve into the glorious (and occasionally questionable) ways to spend your hard-fought cash:
Essentials for the Frugal Shinobi:
- Coin Purses: The first rule of Sen Club? Don't lose Sen Club! Invest in these babies to ensure your fortune survives even the most spectacular face-plants. Safety first, kids.
- Gourd Seeds: More healing means less dying (hopefully). Top up your gourd and become the cockroach of Ashina: unkillable and slightly horrifying.
- Rice/Fine Snow: Estus Flask, but make it Sekiro. Stock up on these for quick heals mid-battle, because let's be honest, you're probably going to need them.
Flashy Upgrades for the Fashionable Fighter:
- Prosthetic Tools: From flamethrowers to shuriken launchers, these bad boys add spice to your combat. Just remember, looking cool doesn't guarantee victory (but it might impress the local crows).
- Shinobi Arts: Become a whirlwind of death with flashy combat moves. Think "Mortal Kombat," but with more katanas and less questionable dance moves.
- Costumes: Because who doesn't want to fight eldritch horrors in style? Dress to impress, even if your audience is mostly angry dogs and traumatized villagers.
Questionable Investments for the Gambler in All of Us:
- Mysterious Balloons: Who knows what's inside? Probably not your lost sen, but hey, where's the adventure without a little risk? (Spoiler alert: it's probably fireworks.)
- Carp Scales: Trade these with the creepy pot merchant for...interesting things. Just don't expect a refund if you get a giant severed finger instead of that cool sword you wanted.
- Anything from the Snake Eyes: They're shady, they're sassy, and their wares are probably cursed. But hey, you only live once (well, technically twice in Sekiro). Treat yo'self!
Remember, Shinobi: Sen is power, but so is survival. Spend wisely, fight bravely, and most importantly, laugh in the face of death (because what else can you do?). Just make sure you have enough sen left over for a decent sake after you finally (hopefully) conquer Ashina.
Bonus Tip: If you're really strapped for cash, consider selling those questionable items you've been collecting. Like, why do you have 12 severed fingers? Do you have a weird hobby we don't know about? Just saying, someone might pay good money for those...
Disclaimer: This guide is for entertainment purposes only. The author is not responsible for any lost sen, questionable purchases, or sudden snake-person attacks. Use at your own risk (and with a healthy dose of humor).