You and the Share Market: A Hilarious Misadventure (with a Side of TMS)
Let's face it, folks, the share market can sound about as exciting as watching paint dry. Numbers flying, charts that look like your EKG after a particularly strong cup of coffee, and enough jargon to make your brain do the Macarena. But fear not, intrepid investor wannabes! Today, we're cracking the code on buying shares through TMS, Nepal's very own share market hero, and turning this into an adventure that's more "Indiana Jones" and less "nap time."
How To Buy Share From Tms |
Gearing Up for Glory (or at Least, Reasonable Returns)
First things first, you need a Demat account. Think of it as your personal treasure chest, but instead of gold doubloons, you'll be stockpiling shares. Get one from a broker – they're the sherpas of this financial Everest. Don't worry, the process is easier than deciphering the ending of Inception.
Tip: Take your time with each sentence.![]()
Next, download TMS, the software that connects you to the market. Imagine it as your trusty whip (minus the whole cracking-slaves thing). This is where the real fun begins!
Tip: Absorb, don’t just glance.![]()
Conquering TMS: A Quest (Mostly with Clicking)
Okay, TMS might not be the most intuitive program ever created. It can be a bit like navigating a jungle gym designed by Escher. But fret not, we'll break it down like a Kinder Egg – fun, colorful, and with a little surprise inside (hopefully, some profitable trades!).
Tip: Check back if you skimmed too fast.![]()
- Finding Your Quarry (a.k.a. Shares): Look for the company you fancy investing in. Think of them as the exotic birds you're trying to spot on your safari (except, you know, they lay dividends instead of eggs).
- Placing Your Bid (But Hopefully Not Getting Kidnapped): This is where you decide how many shares you want and how much you're willing to pay. Remember, haggling is encouraged – this ain't a fancy department store!
- Order Types: A Choose-Your-Own-Adventure: There are different order types in TMS, like "market" or "limit." Don't worry, they won't involve outrunning boulders or placating angry natives. A quick Google search will be your best friend here.
Remember: Patience is key, grasshopper. The market can be fickle, so don't expect overnight riches (unless you accidentally stumble upon a hidden stash of unicorn tears, but that's a story for another day).
QuickTip: Skim slowly, read deeply.![]()
And the Hilarious Part Begins...
Now, the fun part: watching your shares go up and down like a rollercoaster on a sugar rush. Just be prepared to laugh – sometimes at your own expense. You might make some questionable decisions (buying that one share of "Bathtub Emporium Inc." seemed like a good idea at 3 am), but hey, that's part of the adventure, right?
Here are some bonus tips to keep the laughter coming:
- Don't invest your rent money. Unless you enjoy the scenic view from a cardboard box.
- Befriend experienced investors. They'll be the ones laughing the least (because they've already made all the silly mistakes).
- Enjoy the ride! The share market is a game, and sometimes, the best part is just playing.
So, there you have it! A not-so-serious guide to buying shares through TMS. Remember, the road to riches (or at least, a comfortable retirement) might be bumpy, but with a little humor and some sound financial decisions, you'll be a seasoned investor in no time. Now, get out there, and conquer that share market like Indiana Jones with a stock portfolio!