The Great Down Under Boob Quest: A Hilarious Guide to Finding Your Perfect Bra Size in Australia
Let's face it, ladies (and anyone else on the bra-wearing spectrum), finding the right bra size can feel like searching for the Holy Grail... except less medieval and more metal. Bras that dig in like overzealous koala claws? Straps that could hold up a kangaroo joey? Back bands that seem better suited for a game of backyard cricket? We've all been there. But fear not, fellow bra warriors! This guide is here to crack the code of Aussie bra sizing and banish those wardrobe woes faster than a boomerang returning at high speed (safety first, friends!).
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| How To Get Correct Bra Size Australia |
Step 1: Become a Measuring Master (Without the Maths Degree)
Forget complex equations, we're after bra-fitting basics, not a calculus lesson. You'll need a trusty tape measure (bonus points for one decorated with wombats or quokkas). Here's the lowdown on getting those all-important numbers:
QuickTip: Highlight useful points as you read.
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The Underbust Rodeo: Stand tall, grab your tape measure, and wrangle it around your ribcage, just under the bust. Breathe normally – you're not trying to win a breath-holding contest against a lungfish. Remember: Snug but not suffocating is the name of the game.
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The Full Monty (Minus the Full Monty): Now, for the overbust. Measure around the fullest part of your breasts (while wearing a non-padded bra, if possible). Keep the tape level and don't compress those puppies!
Step 2: The Size Decoder Ring (No Ring Required)
Now that you've got your measurements, it's time to crack the bra-size code. Here's a simplified version (because ain't nobody got time for deciphering ancient bra hieroglyphics):
Tip: Take a sip of water, then continue fresh.
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The Band Battle: Subtract your underbust measurement from your overbust measurement. The difference will determine your cup size (think of it as a point system for perkiness!).
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Cup Size Champs:
- 1 inch difference = A cup
- 2 inch difference = B cup
- 3 inch difference = C cup
- (And so on...)
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The Band Brigade: Add a corresponding number to your underbust measurement to get your band size. Here's the (slightly wonky) conversion chart:
- Underbust measurement less than 33 inches: Add 5 (e.g., 30 inches + 5 = 34 band size)
- Underbust measurement over 33 inches: Add 3 (e.g., 36 inches + 3 = 39 band size)
Bold means this is super important: If your underbust measurement falls on an odd number, round up to the nearest even number for the band size.
Tip: A slow, careful read can save re-reading later.
Step 3: The Fitting Fiesta (Because Why Not Make it Fun?)
Now that you're armed with your bra-size intel, it's time for the real fun – trying on bras! Grab a supportive friend (or your most honest mirror) and head to your favourite lingerie store. Here are some tips to ensure a giggle-worthy (and successful) fitting:
Tip: Bookmark this post to revisit later.
- Don't be Shy: Retail assistants are there to help, not judge. Embrace the awkwardness and ask questions – that's what they're paid for!
- The Bounce Test: A gentle jiggle should result in minimal movement. If your girls are doing the Macarena, the bra ain't the one.
- The Pinch Test: Can you pinch some fabric at the back band? If so, the band might be too loose.
- The Comfort Check: A good bra should feel like a supportive hug, not a medieval torture device.
The Final Frontier: Embrace the Perfect Fit
Finding the right bra size is a journey, not a destination. Your size might fluctuate over time, so don't be afraid to re-measure every so often. Remember, a good bra is an investment in your comfort and confidence. So, celebrate your victory with a celebratory Tim Tam or two – you've earned it!
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