Skyrim's Most Awkward Sleepover: How to Survive "With Friends Like These..."
Ah, Skyrim. Land of majestic dragons, epic adventures, and...murderous roommates? Yes, that's right. The "With Friends Like These..." quest in Skyrim throws you into the heart of a family dysfunction so messy, even the Dovahkiin might need a therapist. But fear not, fellow Dragonborn! This guide will equip you with the knowledge (and hopefully the sanity) to navigate this bizarre situation.
How To Get With Friends Like These Quest Skyrim |
Step 1: Befriend a Grieving Orphan (Optional)
This isn't mandatory, but it adds a delightful layer of "wait, what?" to the whole ordeal. Head to Windhelm and befriend Aventus Aretino, a young lad with a serious grudge against his orphanage headmistress, Grelod the Kind (emphasis on the VERY sarcastic "Kind"). Help him achieve some, ahem, finality with Grelod, and a mysterious note will appear in your inventory. Sleep on it (anywhere BUT Windhelm, for some reason), and brace yourself for the real fun to begin.
QuickTip: Re-reading helps retention.![]()
Step 2: The Rude Awakening (Literally)
You wake up to find Astrid, a woman with a resting murder face that could curdle milk, staring down at you. Turns out, she's with the Dark Brotherhood, a shadowy assassin guild with a penchant for...well, assassinations. They're impressed with your orphanage handiwork and offer you a "welcome gift": the chance to murder someone in their sleep.
Tip: Don’t overthink — just keep reading.![]()
Side Note: Astrid doesn't even offer coffee. Rude.
QuickTip: Reread for hidden meaning.![]()
Step 3: The Moral Conundrum (with Hilarious Implications)
Here's the twist: your "gift" isn't some random bandit. It's one of their own captives! Talk about an awkward housewarming party favor. You have a choice:
Tip: Read actively — ask yourself questions as you go.![]()
- Become a cold-blooded killer and join the Dark Brotherhood. This unlocks a whole new questline filled with delightful tasks like eliminating inconvenient spouses and silencing pesky witnesses. Just your average day in Skyrim, really.
- Revolt! Fight Astrid and escape the creepy shack. This path is less, uh, stabby, but means missing out on some unique gear and quests.
Pro-Tip: If you choose the murder route, make sure to grab the Dark Brotherhood armor before leaving. It's surprisingly comfy...for assassinations.
Step 4: Reap What You Sow (or Don't)
Congratulations! You've either embraced your inner assassin or politely declined a career change involving cutlery and unsuspecting throats. Whichever path you choose, "With Friends Like These..." is a wild ride that perfectly captures the quirky charm (and occasional darkness) of Skyrim.
So there you have it! A (hopefully) helpful and hilarious guide to surviving Skyrim's most awkward sleepover. Remember, when in doubt, just roll with the punches (or stab someone in the face, depending on your moral compass). Now get out there and make some...interesting friends!