Stuck in Traffic? Don't Be a Shoulder Surfer in Texas: A Hilarious Guide for Motorcyclists
Ah, Texas. Land of wide-open spaces, ten-gallon hats, and...traffic jams? Yep, even the Lone Star State isn't immune to the soul-crushing crawl that is rush hour. And for our motorcycle brethren, these slow-moving situations can be especially tempting to navigate via the shoulder. But hold on to your chaps, riders, because using the shoulder in Texas is about as legal as wearing a Stetson in Antarctica.
Why You Shouldn't Shoulder Surf (Besides Looking Like a Total Dude)
Let's face it, scooting along the shoulder might seem like a shortcut to freedom. You see all those cages (cars, for you non-bikers) stuck in molasses, and your inner Easy Rider awakens. But here's the thing, buddies: that little strip of asphalt next to the road? It's not a magic lane for impatient two-wheelers. It's an emergency lane, reserved for those heroes in flashing lights who keep our roads safe. Blocking their path is a surefire way to ruin your day – with a ticket, that is.
Think of it this way: Would you want a motorcycle weaving in and out of traffic while you're trying to chase down a rogue armadillo on the loose? Didn't think so.
But Wait, There's More! (The Exceptions, That Is)
Okay, okay, so shoulder surfing is generally a no-go. But Texas, bless its heart, offers a few exceptions for our motorcycle friends:
- You Didn't Mean To: Let's say you accidentally drifted onto the shoulder (maybe a rogue tumbleweed blew you off course?). No worries, as long as you scoot back into traffic safely, you should be alright. Just avoid making it a habit, we wouldn't want to encourage bad motorcycling karma.
- Evading Danger Like a Badass: If you find yourself in a sticky situation – like a four-wheeler about to play bumper cars with your bike – feel free to take evasive action, shoulder included. Your safety trumps traffic laws any day. Just remember to get back into traffic when it's safe to do so.
Here's the golden rule: Use the shoulder only when absolutely necessary. It's not a personal racetrack, and those emergency vehicles appreciate a clear path.
So, What Can You Do When Stuck in Traffic?
Alright, so shoulder surfing is out. But what are your options when you're surrounded by metal snails and your leathers are starting to feel more like a sauna suit?
- Embrace the Zen of Slow Cruising: Sometimes, acceptance is key. Put on some tunes, relax your grip, and enjoy the scenery (or people-watch those bored drivers). Think of it as mobile meditation.
- Channel Your Inner Entertainer: Stuck next to a minivan full of kids? Bust out some funny faces or practice your air guitar skills. They might just forget about the traffic and give you a show in return (just don't fall off your bike in the process!).
- Bond with Your Fellow Bikers: Traffic jams are a great opportunity to chat with your motorcycle comrades. Talk shop, share stories, or philosophize about the meaning of life on two wheels. Just keep your eyes on the road while you chat, safety first!
Remember, motorcyclists in Texas, we're all in this together. So follow the rules, stay safe, and find creative ways to make the most of those slow-moving situations. After all, isn't that what the open road (or, well, the not-so-open road) is all about?
