You, Newark, and Houston: A Tale of Two Cities (and How Long It Takes to Fly Between Them)
Ah, the age-old question for the aspiring astronaut (or just someone who wants to get out of Newark): how long does it take to fly from Newark, New Jersey to Houston, Texas? Buckle up, buttercup, because we're about to embark on a journey that's shorter than your uncle Steve's conspiracy theories at Thanksgiving dinner, but longer than a trip to the grocery store when you forget milk (because let's be real, you're gonna wander down every aisle for nostalgia's sake).
The Great Escape: Newark Edition
Let's face it, Newark isn't exactly known for its beaches (unless you count the occasional spilled vat of mystery goo). So, if you're looking to trade the gritty cityscapes for some Texas two-steppin', you're probably chomping at the bit to know how long you'll be stuck in a metal bird hurtling through the sky.
Spoiler alert: It's not that long. We're talking around 4 hours, give or take. That's less time than it takes to watch the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy (extended editions, of course), which is a win in anyone's book (except maybe Elijah Wood's).
Houston, We Have a Liftoff (and Maybe Some Barbecue?)
So you've braved the Newark Turnpike (a feat in itself), boarded the plane without accidentally bringing a rogue cashew in your carry-on (because let's be honest, who hasn't tried that?), and now you're soaring towards Houston.
Here's the beauty of this flight: it's long enough to catch up on some sleep or a good book, but short enough that you won't have time to contemplate the existential dread of being suspended thousands of feet in the air (unless that's your thing, no judgement).
The Bottom Line: You'll Be in Texas Faster Than You Can Say "Yeehaw!"
Look, the point is this: Newark to Houston? It's a breeze, baby. A transatlantic hop it ain't. So, pack your bags, grab your cowboy hat (optional, but highly encouraged), and get ready to experience everything Texas has to offer, from its legendary hospitality to its questionable fashion choices (we're looking at you, giant belt buckles).
P.S. Don't forget the sunscreen. Texas ain't messing around when it comes to sunshine.
