You Say "Nautical Miles," I Say "Pool Floaties Across the Pacific" - How Far is THAT From LA?
Ever get the travel bug and then immediately get smacked down by the realization you're geographically challenged? You know, that moment when you see a picture of a gloriously secluded beach and think, "Man, that'd be epic... but is it like, a ten-hour swim from LAX?" Yeah, us too.
Fear not, fellow landlubbers (and those who just haven't gotten around to memorizing nautical miles)! This here guide will be your hilarious (and vaguely informative) compass to navigating distances from the City of Angels.
Coasting Close to Home: Neighborly Nautical Numbers
- San Diego: A chill 55 nautical miles down the California coast. Basically, a long weekend on a jet ski if you're feeling adventurous (though the Coast Guard might have a word with you).
- Santa Barbara: Ah, a mere 90 nautical miles north. Perfect for a scenic day trip, assuming your boat has a killer sound system and a well-stocked cooler.
Island Hopping: Not as Easy as Animal Crossing
- Hawaii: Buckle up, buttercup, because we're talking about 2,400 to 2,800 nautical miles, depending on which island you have your heart set on. Basically, enough time to learn how to navigate by the stars, become fluent in Hawaiian, and write a whole dang novel.
Pro Tip: Pack seasickness meds. Lots of them.
- Fiji: This South Pacific paradise is a cool 4,500 nautical miles from LA. So yeah, unless you have a yacht named "Wanderlust" and a crew that can handle catching their own dinner, this might be a dream for another day.
The "Are You Serious?!" Zone
- Australia: Fancy a trip Down Under? That'll be a cool 7,000 to 8,000 nautical miles, depending on your final Aussie destination. By the time you get there, you'll be able to expertly identify all the different types of spiders (essential skill, obviously).
Fun Fact: That's far enough to travel around the Earth three times... at the equator.
- Europe: Feeling fancy? Let's set sail for Europe! We're talking about a whopping 5,000 to 8,000 nautical miles, depending on which European country is calling your name. Just remember, those croissants better be worth it.
Final Note: These are just a taste of the vast nautical distances out there. The world is your oyster (or perhaps a giant squid, depending on where you're going). So, grab a map, a sense of humor, and maybe a good seasickness remedy, and get exploring!
