So You Want to Split Up in Texas, and There are Mini-Yous Involved? Buckle Up for the Cost Ride!
Ah, Texas. Land of wide-open spaces, ten-gallon hats, and apparently, really expensive divorces, especially when there are wee ones in the picture. If you're contemplating a split from your spouse and have offspring under 18, then you might be wondering: just how much is this whole untying-the-knot business gonna set me back?
The Not-So-Happy Medium: The Average Texan Divorce with a Child
Let's talk turkey. The average cost of a Texas divorce with a cherub (or two, or three) in tow is a cool $23,500. Ouch. That's like a down payment on a decent-sized swimming pool, which might be tempting after all this marital drama. But hey, at least you can drown your sorrows in margaritas poolside, right?
Why is it So Expensive? Because Divorce Ain't Simple, Honey!
There are a bunch of reasons why a divorce with a kiddo can cost more than a semester at a fancy Texas university (and let me tell you, those can be pricey too!). Here's the lowdown:
- Child Custody Battles: The Lawyer Rodeo - This is where things can get messy (and expensive). If you and your ex can't agree on who gets little Billy Sue every other weekend, then you're looking at lawyer showdowns that would make J.R. Ewing proud. Be prepared for fancy legal terminology being thrown around like confetti at a rodeo, and your wallet feeling lighter than a tumbleweed.
- The Great Texas Property Round-Up - Texas has something called "community property," which basically means everything you acquired during the marriage gets split down the middle. Sounds fair, right? Well, unless you're arguing over who gets the slightly-used fondue pot or the questionable porcelain clown collection. Every little disagreement adds to the billable hours.
But Wait! There's Hope (and Maybe Savings) for the Frugal Divorcee!
Don't despair, soon-to-be-single Texans! Here are some ways to keep your divorce from becoming a financial armageddon:
- Be Amicable, Y'all! - This might be easier said than done, but if you and your ex can approach the divorce like civilized adults and agree on things like custody and property division, then you can save a ton of cash. Think of it as a pre-divorce couples therapy session...minus the awkward group hugs.
- DIY Divorce? Maybe Not Exactly...But There Are Options! - For those truly adventurous souls, there are online resources and self-help books on divorce. However, unless you have a law degree hidden under that ten-gallon hat, this might be a recipe for disaster (and a very confused judge). Consider mediation instead - a neutral third party can help you and your ex hash things out without resorting to lawyer gladiatorial combat.
Remember, Folks, There's Life After Divorce (and It Doesn't Have to Cost a Fortune!)
Divorce can be a drag, emotionally and financially. But with a little planning, some compromise, and maybe a good sense of humor, you can get through it without breaking the bank. Now go forth, embrace your new single life in Texas, and remember, sometimes the best things in life are cheaper than a divorce with a child! (Like, say, a two-step lesson or a plate of good barbecue.)
