QWOP: The Hilarious Exercise in Frustration You Didn't Know You Needed
Ever wondered what it would be like to control a runner with the coordination of a drunken newborn giraffe? Well, my friend, buckle up and get ready for QWOP! This physics-based game will have you laughing, crying, and questioning your own sanity, all in the span of five minutes.
Getting Started: A Recipe for Disaster
QWOP boasts a minimalist approach. You have four glorious buttons: Q, W, O, and P. These control the independent movements of each of our runner's legs. Easy, right? Wrong. Imagine trying to tap dance with cinderblocks strapped to your ankles – that's the level of control you have here.
Pro-Tip: Mashing the buttons will only lead to a face-plant of epic proportions. Patience, grasshopper.
Those First Tentative Steps (or Flops)
Your initial attempts at getting this wobbly fellow to move will likely resemble a synchronized swimming routine gone horribly wrong. There will be flailing, flopping, and a distinct lack of forward motion. Embrace the chaos! This is where the real fun begins.
But wait, there's more! Here are some "helpful" hints to (hopefully) get you started:
- Tapping O repeatedly can get your runner's leg to swing forward, propelling him (emphasis on the "him") a glorious inch or two.
- Alternating Q and P in a rhythmic fashion might (maybe, possibly) lead to something resembling a walking motion.
Remember: Slow and steady wins the race in QWOP. Unless, of course, your goal is to achieve maximum hilarity.
From Flop to (Uncontrolled) Glory!
As you master the delicate art of leg manipulation (emphasis on "art"), you might actually see some semblance of running. This is a momentous occasion! Celebrate! But don't get too cocky. QWOP is a fickle mistress, and one wrong button press can send your runner into a spectacular display of acrobatics that would make Cirque du Soleil jealous.
The ultimate goal? Crossing the finish line in under, well, let's just say "an eternity."
QWOP: A Love-Hate Relationship You Won't Forget
QWOP is a game that will test your patience, challenge your reflexes, and leave you with a side-splitting laugh. It's a frustrating, hilarious, and strangely addictive journey that will stay with you long after you (or rather, your runner) inevitably face-plants into the ground.
So, are you ready to embark on this glorious exercise in futility? Head over to [a popular web games site] and prepare to witness the majesty (or utter disaster) that is QWOP!
