So You're Saying Goodbye? How to Craft a Full & Final Love Letter (Without the Mush)
Ah, the Full and Final Settlement letter. The document that marks the end of an era (or a dramatic escape through the emergency exit, depending on your situation). But before you slam your desk drawer shut and yeet yourself out the door, there's a tiny formality to address: the FnF letter. Don't worry, it's not rocket science, but a little humor can go a long way (especially if your boss has a good sense of humor...or needs one).
Subject Line: Don't Cry, But Here's My FnF Info (Because Lawyers)
First things first, the subject line. Ditch the boring "Full and Final Settlement Request." Get creative! Here are a few options:
- ** Dropping the Mic (and My Bank Details)**
- ** Farewell Fiesta! (Pay Me What You Owe!)**
- ** Tipping My Hat (and Hoping for a Big Tip)**
Pro-Tip: Keep it professional-ish. You never know when you might need a good reference (or maybe your future boss and your current one follow each other on LinkedIn...yikes!).
Body of the Beast: Where the Magic Happens (and the Money Hopefully Flows)
Now for the main event. Here's a template to get you started:
Dear [HR Person's Name] (or [Insert Appropriate Salutation]),
As you may or may not know (depending on how many times the office fire alarm went off because of my questionable cooking), I'm moving on to pastures new (or maybe a long-overdue vacation). My last day of rocking this awesome company will be [Your Last Day].
In accordance with the sacred texts (aka the employee handbook), I'd like to request a swift and painless full and final settlement of my dues. This includes, but is not limited to:
- The Big Bucks: Salary for [Pay Period] (because rent doesn't pay itself, sadly).
- Unused Vacation Days: Because who wouldn't want to be paid for NOT working? (Don't judge, we all dream of that life).
- Expense Reimbursements: Remember that time I, uh, "accidentally" bought a lifetime supply of sticky notes for the office? (Just kidding...or am I?).
Please note: If there are any outstanding company property in my possession (like that slightly-broken stapler I "borrowed" three years ago), fear not! I'll return it promptly. (Maybe. Possibly.)
P.S.: Feel free to throw in a pizza party for my farewell (because free pizza is the universal language of goodbye). Totally kidding (or am I?).
P.P.S.: Seriously though, thanks for everything. I wish you and the company all the best.
Sincerely,
[Your Name] (The [Your Job Title] Who Will Be Missed...Probably)
But Wait, There's More!
Remember, this is just a template. Feel free to personalize it with your own brand of humor (as long as it's office-appropriate, of course). You can also add a touch of gratitude for your time at the company or a cheeky inside joke your team would appreciate.
Most importantly, keep it clear, concise, and professional (with a sprinkle of fun). After all, you want to end your tenure on a positive note (and hopefully get that FnF settled quickly so you can, you know, actually leave).
