The Big One (That Actually Took Everything): What If Los Angeles Poof-ed Out of Existence?
Ever wondered what would happen if Los Angeles, the City of Angels (and questionable fashion choices), just...vanished? Like, blinked and it was gone? Well, folks, buckle up because we're about to take a wild ride down the rabbit hole of hypothetical absurdity.
Hollywood: From Red Carpets to Tumbleweeds
Imagine it: awards season without the pretentious speeches and spray tans. No more traffic jams caused by movie stars running errands for their kombucha-guzzling poodles. Disneyland would be a ghost town (although, with slightly shorter lines, so maybe that's a win?). Hollywood producers would be scrambling to rewrite scripts, desperately trying to find a new "in" location besides that trendy juice bar on Melrose.
The upside? Rent in New York might finally become affordable. Maybe.
The Great Californian Exodus (Except for, You Know, Those Vibing by the Beach)
Millions of aspiring actors, screenwriters, and influencers would be left wondering what to do with their headshots and carefully curated Instagram feeds. Silicon Valley would be in chaos as they desperately search for a new pool of app developers who are equally comfortable coding and getting spray tans (turns out that Venn diagram is smaller than you think).
However, surfers in Malibu would probably be ecstatic. Uncrowded waves, brah!
The Global Ripple Effect (Because Everything is Important on the Internet)
The internet would be a wasteland. Memes would dry up faster than a Kardashian marriage. Conspiracy theorists would have a field day, coming up with even more outlandish theories about what happened (aliens, obviously). Las Vegas casinos would take a major hit, with Elvis impersonators everywhere wondering where all their business went.
The good news? The Kardashians would finally have to get real jobs. (Okay, that might be a stretch.)
But Wait, There's More! The Existential Crisis of San Andreas
Let's not forget about poor San Andreas. Suddenly, their biggest rival is gone. What's the point of having a fault line if there's no glamorous city to dramatically destroy? Would they have to settle for flattening Bakersfield? The existential dread would be real, folks.
So, There You Have It: A World Without La La Land
The world would definitely be a different place without Los Angeles. There would be less traffic, more affordable housing (in some places), and a definite shortage of good avocado toast. But hey, at least we wouldn't have to hear about celebrity breakups anymore. Unless, of course, they all decide to move to New York. Ugh.
So, what do you think? Would the world be better or worse without Los Angeles? Let us know in the comments (because apparently, according to this scenario, the internet still works...for now).
