So, You Wanna Be a Do-Not-Resuscitate Texan? A Guide to Not-So-Spooky Ghosting in the Lone Star State
Howdy, partners! Ever felt like giving the Grim Reaper the ol' two-step when your time's up? Well, fret no more! This here guide will lasso you the info on how to make a Do-Not-Resuscitate (DNR) order legal and hootin' tootin' valid in the great state of Texas.
Now, hold your horses! A DNR ain't some magic horseshoe that keeps you from shuffling off this mortal coil. It simply tells medical professionals to hold the paddles and let nature take its course if your heart decides to yodel its last tune. But before you go all Wyatt Earp on Death himself, there are a few hoops to jump through to make sure your wishes are clear as a bluebonnet sky.
The In-Hospital Hootenanny: Doc Says "Howdy" to Your DNR
Let's say you're moseyin' on into the hospital for a procedure. There, your trusty doctor, bless their cotton socks, can whip up a shiny new DNR order. But for this here paperwork to have more kick than a jackrabbit on mescaline, it needs a few things:
- You gotta be thinkin' straight: Yep, you need to be of sound mind when you give the go-ahead for the DNR.
- Doctors gotta get scribblin': Your physician needs to put it all down on paper, datin' it and makin' it official.
- Your words are golden: You can also write down your wishes yourself, as long as it's clear and signed when you were still thinkin' straight.
Now, that's a rootin' tootin' in-hospital DNR, folks!
Out-of-Hospital Hootenanny: Hold Your Horses 'til the Witnesses Saddle Up
But what if you're tendin' to your cattle and take a tumble? Fear not, cowboys and cowgirls! Texas has you covered with Out-of-Hospital DNRs. Here's what makes this critter legal:
- Your signature is key: Gotta put your John Hancock on that there form, just like signin' a brand new deed.
- Doc still gets a say: Your friendly neighborhood doctor needs to give it the thumbs up too.
- Witness Wranglin': You need to rustle up two adult witnesses who are squeaky clean (no family, no inheritance claims, and definitely not on your payroll). OR, you can get a notary public to witness it instead.
There you have it, pilgrims! A valid Out-of-Hospital DNR, clear as a West Texas sunset.
Remember: Keep your fancy DNR form handy, like a trusty pocket watch. Consider wearin' a DNR bracelet or necklace, just to be on the safe side.
Now, this here guide ain't a substitute for professional advice. If you have any questions, best mosey on over to your doctor or a lawyer who specializes in healthcare.
So, there you have it, folks! With a little know-how, you can make sure your wishes are respected, even if you're kickin' the bucket. Now, git along little doggies, and remember, livin' life to the fullest is always the best medicine!