Dude, It's 2024: A Time Travel Guide to Texas Football (Because Apparently You Need One)
Let's face it, folks. We've all been there. You're elbow-deep in a heated debate with your co-worker about college football (because, let's be honest, what else is there to argue about on a Monday morning?). Suddenly, the conversation takes a sharp turn into the Twilight Zone when you drop a confident, "Isn't Ewers a freshman this year?"
Cue crickets. Followed by your co-worker staring at you like you just sprouted a second head.
Wait a Minute, Did I Fall Through a Wormhole?
Fear not, my friend! You haven't been abducted by aliens (although, that would be a way cooler story). You simply haven't gotten the memo: Quinn Ewers is a seasoned gunslinger, not a wide-eyed rookie. This dude is in his third year slinging the pigskin for the Texas Longhorns, and trust me, he's already etched his name in Texas football history.
How Did We Get Here? A Quick Ewers Recap (Because We Can't All Be Time Lords)
- 2021: Ewers is the hottest high school quarterback prospect since sliced bread. He inks a legendary NIL deal (because apparently this kid likes his bank account thicc) and heads to Ohio State.
- December 2021: Plot twist! Ewers decides Ohio State isn't the place for him (maybe the scarlet and gray just didn't match his swagger) and announces he's transferring to the University of Texas.
- 2022: Ewers takes the reins as the Longhorns' starting quarterback. Let's just say, his arm talent isn't the only thing that's impressive.
- 2023: Ewers leads Texas to a breakout season, throws a record-breaking amount of yards in the Big 12 Championship Game (because apparently he likes breaking records), and gets named MVP. Easy peasy, right?
So, the Moral of the Story Is...
Don't worry, fellow football fan, it happens to the best of us. But hey, at least now you're armed with some serious Texas football knowledge to impress your co-worker (or, you know, avoid any future temporal misunderstandings). Just remember, Quinn Ewers is here to stay, and the future is looking mighty orange (or burnt orange, to be precise) in Austin.
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