Buckle Up, Texans Fans: Are We Going Dancing or Day Drinking?
The question that's been keeping Houston psychiatrists busier than J.J. Watt's workout playlist: Can the Texans actually make the playoffs? Let's face it, folks, this season has been wilder than a rodeo clown convention on tequila. We started with the expectations of a participation trophy, then Coach Ryans turned this team into a scrappy underdog with a mean right hook (thanks, Will Anderson Jr.! ). But with the playoffs looming, the suspense is thicker than Texas humidity in August.
The Road to Redemption (or Road Rage?)
Here's the deal: the Texans control their own destiny. Win their last two games, and they're in. Easy, right? Except their next opponent is the Indianapolis Colts, a team with a playoff hunger that rivals a hangry toddler. Win that game, and they're guaranteed a wildcard spot. But wait, there's more! If the Jacksonville Jaguars lose to the Tennessee Titans (come on, Titans, do us a solid!), then Houston could snag the AFC South crown - a feat most Texans fans would have choked on their breakfast tacos over a month ago.
So, what are the odds?
Well, they're about as clear as a Dr. Pepper after a day at the rodeo. Some folks say the Texans have a fighting chance, others say they have a snowball's chance in you-know-where. The New York Times says they have a 48% chance of making the playoffs, which is basically the same odds of finding a decent parking spot at the Galleria during the holidays.
But hey, Texans fans are nothing if not optimistic (or delusional, depending on who you ask).
We've weathered the Deshaun Watson drama, the years of "almost there" seasons, and enough losing to make grown men cry into their queso. If there's a team that can defy the odds and pull off a playoff miracle, it's our boys in battle red.
So, what should we do?
Stock up on snacks (both celebratory and sadness-induced), break out the lucky jerseys (even if it's the David Carr one - desperate times, people!), and prepare for a rollercoaster ride of emotions. Win or lose, this season has been one for the ages. Here's to the Houston Texans, the team that keeps us on the edge of our seats (and occasionally throws us off entirely).
Now, let's go make the playoffs and prove all the doubters wrong... or at least provide some epic meme material for the rest of the NFL.
