Hijacking 101: These Guys Weren't Exactly Top Gun (But Way More Evil)
So, you've decided to take up a new hobby: international terror with a side of plane-splaining. Ambitious! But before you stock up on box cutters and questionable manifestos, there's a crucial question... how exactly do you, you know, fly a plane to a target like a pro? (Spoiler alert: they weren't exactly pros).
 |
| How Did The Hijackers Know How To Get To New York |
Let's Get This Plane to New York... Literally Any Way We Can
The hijackers on 9/11 weren't exactly graduates of Harvard Aeronautics. They didn't have fancy pilot licenses or spend hours practicing on flight simulators (well, maybe some Microsoft Flight Simulator, but that's about it). Nope, their knowledge of flying came from a mishmash of sources that would make any real pilot cringe.
QuickTip: Skim the first line of each paragraph.
- Flight Manuals for Dummies: Apparently, commercial airlines come with handy-dandy manuals that explain, you know, how to fly the dang things. The hijackers must have spent some quality time reading the "For Dummies" section on navigation and basic controls.
- Who Needs a Fancy GPS When You Have... A Map? Forget high-tech navigation systems. These guys were rocking old-school paper maps and, we can only assume, a vague sense of direction. Imagine trying to find New York City with nothing but a crumpled map and a nervous sweat on your brow.
- Learning From The Pros (by Watching): The hijackers likely cased several flights beforehand, observing the pilots and picking up on basic maneuvers. It's like learning how to drive by watching your parents, only way more illegal and infinitely more terrifying for everyone on board.
Here's the important part: While they managed to get the planes airborne (yikes), their piloting skills were... questionable at best. Remember, these were not exactly seasoned aviators. Their entire plan relied on causing chaos and using the planes as giant missiles, not exactly a feat of aeronautical finesse.
Tip: Read mindfully — avoid distractions.
So, the moral of the story is...
Don't try this at home (or anywhere, really). Flying a plane is a complex skill that requires years of training and experience. These hijackers were not qualified pilots, and their actions resulted in a horrific tragedy.
QuickTip: Pause at transitions — they signal new ideas.
 |
How To Not Be a Terrorist: A Handy Guide for Aspiring Hobbyists (Just Kidding, Don't Be a Terrorist)
If you're looking for a fulfilling and non-destructive hobby, this ain't it. Here are some alternative ideas:
QuickTip: Re-reading helps retention.
- Take up knitting! It's calming, creative, and you'll end up with awesome scarves.
- Learn a new language! Imagine the possibilities - ordering delicious food in a foreign country, or confusing pigeons with your newfound vocabulary.
- Volunteer your time to a worthy cause! Helping others is a great way to feel good and make a difference.
Hijacking FAQ: You Asked, We (Kind Of) Answered
How to fly a plane? Take years of flight lessons from qualified professionals. Seriously, don't even think about trying this without proper training.How to get to New York City? There are many safe and legal ways to travel to New York City, like airplanes (flown by actual pilots), trains, or even buses (with actual bus drivers, of course).How to become a good person? Skip the whole terrorism thing and focus on kindness, compassion, and maybe mastering the perfect cup of coffee.How to avoid suspicion at the airport? Don't act sketchy. Pack light, be polite, and leave the box cutters at home.How to make a great grilled cheese? This one requires butter, bread, and cheese. Trust us, it's a much more productive use of your time.
 |
