How to Evict Your Houseguest From Becoming a Squatnasty Resident: A Texas Two-Step (Mostly Legal)
So, you invited your old college buddy, Chad, to crash on your couch for a "few days" while he "figured things out." Fast forward three chimichangas a day and a questionable collection of decorative flamingos later, and Chad's become more permanent fixture than your childhood wallpaper. Eviction ninjas? Nope, not a thing (though that would be awesome). But fear not, friend, because this guide will help you navigate the legal way to turn your house back into Chad-free zone.
Step One: The Texan Three-Day
Texas law is all about manners, y'all. Before you lawyer up, you gotta give Chad a friendly written notice to vacate. This ain't a passive-aggressive Post-it note situation. This needs to be clear, concise, and delivered in person or by certified mail. Think of it as a formal "Hey Chad, your welcome mat has worn out." Here's the kicker: depending on the reason for eviction, the amount of notice time can vary.
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Non-payment of rent: This one's a clear three-day eviction notice. But seriously, how many chimichangas does one man need?
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Lease violation: Maybe Chad's taken his love for flamingos a bit too far. Check your lease agreement for the specific notice time needed for this situation.
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Month-to-month tenancy: Even without a lease, Texas law requires a 30-day notice to vacate. Plenty of time to find a new home (hopefully flamingo-free).
Step Two: Howdy, Judge! (Maybe)
If Chad ignores your eviction serenade (doubtful, who can resist your charm?), it's time to file a lawsuit in Justice Court. Don't worry, you won't need to wear a powdered wig – business casual will do. This might sound scary, but there are resources available to help you navigate the process. Here are some lifesavers:
- Texas Justice Court website: Chock full of forms and information to get you started.
- Texas Legal Aid: Free or low-cost legal help for those who qualify.
Step Three: The Great Eviction Tango (The Legal Kind)
The court will schedule a hearing to hear both sides of the story. Be prepared to present your case, evidence of the notice, and any lease violations. Remember: this is your chance to convince the judge that Chad's gotta go.
Step Four: Operation: Bye-Bye Chad
If the judge rules in your favor, you'll be granted a writ of possession. This fancy term basically tells the sheriff to mosey on over and politely (with the force of law, of course) remove Chad and his flamingo entourage.
Pro-Tip: Eviction is a stressful situation, but remember a sense of humor can be your friend. Maybe offer Chad a going-away gift of, you guessed it, a flamingo piñata. Just be sure it's delivered after he's moved out (avoiding potential weapon charges).
The Legal Disclaimer:
This ain't legal advice, partner. Every situation is different, so consulting with a lawyer familiar with Texas landlord-tenant law is always your best bet.
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