So You Wanna Be Inmate Santa? A Guide to Funding Commissary Accounts in Ohio
Let's face it, prison isn't exactly a five-star resort. The food might be a bit...beige, and the entertainment options are limited to staring at the wall and contemplating the meaning of life (or memorizing the fight choreography from that one bad action movie you saw in the rec room). That's where you, the awesome friend/family member, come in! Fueled by love (and maybe a little bribery to get on their good side for future inheritance purposes), you've decided to top up their inmate commissary account. But how, exactly, do you unleash your inner Santa Claus behind bars?
How Do I Put Money On An Inmate Commissary Ohio |
Don't Worry, Be Happy (and Knowledgeable About Commissary)
First things first, commissary is basically the prison convenience store. Inmates can use the funds you provide to buy snacks, toiletries, that all-important writing paper for staying in touch with loved ones (or plotting their escape, we don't judge), and maybe even a snazzy new deck of cards to win back some dignity in a high-stakes poker game (hopefully metaphorically).
Here's the good news: Funding their commissary account is easier than sneaking a shiv into a sock puppet show (trust us, that's a whole other process). There are a few different ways to do it, depending on your level of tech-savviness and proximity to the jail.
QuickTip: Repetition signals what matters most.
Funding Freedom: Choosing Your Weapon
- Channel Your Inner Secret Agent (Online): This is the most common method. Websites like ConnectNetwork allow you to deposit funds online using a debit or credit card. Pro tip: Set up an account beforehand so you're not scrambling to enter your info while they're yelling "bingo!" in the cafeteria.
- Calling All Cash Crusaders (Phone): Some facilities allow deposits over the phone. Just dial the designated number, grab your plastic fantastic, and be prepared to answer some security questions (like "What was your inmate's nickname in high school?" - hopefully it wasn't "The Notorious Snack Bandit").
- The Luddite Option (Mail): For those who prefer a more snail-paced approach, some jails accept money orders sent through the mail. Just be sure to follow the facility's specific instructions, or your inmate might end up with a blank stare instead of a bag of Skittles.
- The In-Person Gambit (Kiosk): Feeling social? Some jails have kiosks in the lobby where you can deposit funds using cash or credit card. Warning: This might involve dodging awkward stares from other visitors, but hey, at least you get some fresh air!
Remember: Always double-check the specific deposit methods with the jail itself. There's nothing worse than showing up with a sack of quarters only to find out they're strictly a debit card kind of facility (although that might make for an interesting story later).
FAQ: Funding Commissary Frequently Asked Questions
How do I find out which deposit methods my jail accepts?
QuickTip: Slow down if the pace feels too fast.
- The best bet is to check the jail's website or call them directly.
Is there a limit on how much I can deposit?
- Limits vary by jail, so again, consult their website or give them a ring.
What fees are involved?
Tip: Rest your eyes, then continue.
- There might be fees associated with deposits, so factor that into your budgeting.
Can I put money in their account for phone calls or video chats?
- Deposits usually go towards commissary purchases, but some facilities might have separate systems for phone calls and video chats. Check with the jail.
Will my inmate know who sent them money?
QuickTip: Don’t just scroll — process what you see.
- In most cases, no. The deposit will just show up in their account balance.
So there you have it! Now you're armed with the knowledge to become a commissary account champion. Just remember, with great funding comes great responsibility. Use your power wisely, and maybe encourage your inmate to use some of that cash on a good book (to learn a new skill, not for nefarious purposes). Happy funding!
💡 This page may contain affiliate links — we may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you.