So You Lost That Feeling of Prime Parking? A (Hopefully) Hilarious Guide to Renewing Your Texas Handicap Placard
Ah, the coveted handicap placard. It's a symbol of freedom (parking freedom, that is) and a badge of honor (for putting up with whatever earned you that placard). But just like that tub of yogurt you forgot about in the back of the fridge, even the best things in life can expire.
Fear not, fellow Texan parker! Renewing your handicap placard is easier than parallel parking a double-decker bus (which, let's be honest, none of us are ever going to attempt). Here's how to get yourself back in the prime parking zone without any breakdowns (hopefully not car-related, at least).
Step 1: Accept That Your Placard Isn't a Participation Trophy
We all know that guy who keeps that participation trophy from kindergarten on their mantle. This ain't that. Expiring placards exist to make sure people who genuinely need them have them. So before you bust out the glitter glue and try to spiff up your old one, acknowledge it's time for a renewal.
Step 2: Download Your Renewal Superhero Cape (Okay, It's Actually a Form)
Head over to the Texas Department of Motor Vehicles website (http://www.txdmv.gov/motorists/disabled-parking-placards-plates), look for the ever-so-thrillingly named "Application for Persons with Disabilities Parking Placard and/or License Plate" (Form VTR-214). Download it, print it, and hold it up high like you're about to save the parking lot from injustice (because, let's face it, bad parking is a crime).
Step 3: Channel Your Inner Artist (But Stick to the Lines)
Grab a pen (unless you're feeling fancy with a calligraphy set) and fill out all the fun stuff on page one of the application. Pro-tip: Leave the doctor section blank for this renewal rodeo.
Step 4: Dig Up Your Placard Archaeology
Now comes the real challenge: finding your old placard. Is it buried under the car seats with that rogue french fry from last week? Did it become one with the abyss that is your purse? Here's the good news: If you can't find Indiana Jones your placard, you can just submit a copy of your original application instead.
Step 5: Become Best Friends with Your Local County Tax Office
Remember that time you aced that DMV written test? Well, pat yourself on the back because you're about to do something almost as impressive. Head down to your local county tax office (because apparently they're the real heroes of handicap placard world) and submit your completed application and your archaeological find (or copy of the original application).
And Then... The Waiting Game (But Hopefully Not for Too Long)
The state of Texas will process your application and send you your shiny new placard. While you wait, try to perfect your disabled parking spot victory dance (air guitar solo optional).
Bonus Tip: Don't Be That Guy
This one's pretty straightforward. Renew your placard before it expires. Trust me, nobody wants to be "that guy" with the expired placard hanging from their rearview mirror, looking longingly at the handicapped spots.
So there you have it! With a little effort and maybe a touch of humor, you'll be back in those prime parking spots before you know it. Now go forth and conquer those parking lots, my friend!
