How High is the High Five in Dallas? An Investigation (Mostly Pointless, But Hilarious)
Ah, the high five. That universal gesture of celebration, accomplishment, or even just a friendly greeting. But have you ever stopped to ponder the exact height of a high five in the great city of Dallas? Buckle up, folks, because we're about to embark on a journey that's equal parts ridiculous and research-deficient (you're welcome).
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| How High Is The High Five In Dallas |
The Great Tex-Ass Debate: Stetsons and Elbow Grease
Now, some might argue that a true Dallas high five involves a ten-gallon Stetson hat. We picture the scenario: two cowboys (or, you know, regular folks) after a successful cattle drive, boots dusty, smiles wide. Their high five connects with a satisfying THWACK, sending the Stetson airborne like a majestic, furry tumbleweed.
QuickTip: Take a pause every few paragraphs.
Problem: Stetsons come in various brim sizes, so this method is wildly unreliable. Not to mention, the likelihood of two Stetson-clad individuals high-fiving in modern Dallas is about as likely as encountering a herd of actual cattle on your lunch break (although, hey, you never know with Texas).
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Let's Get Scientific (Ish)
Okay, so Stetsons are out. How about we try a more "scientific" approach? We could grab a bunch of Dallas residents (a good mix of heights, for accuracy), equip them with high-fiving mitts (think oven mitts for maximum hilarity), and film them high-fiving a marked wall. We'd then analyze the data and BAM! The average Dallas high five height revealed!
Tip: Break it down — section by section.
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Problem: Funding. Permits. The sheer absurdity of people walking around Dallas with oven mitts on their hands (although, it might be a great conversation starter).
Tip: Stop when confused — clarity comes with patience.
The Low-Tech Solution: Winging It
Alright, alright, so maybe there's no definitive answer. But hey, that's half the fun, right? Here's my totally non-scientific guess:
- The Average Dallas High Five: Somewhere around the shoulder-to-mid-head range. It's a comfortable, universal height that doesn't require contortionist skills or accidentally knocking someone's hat off (Stetson or otherwise).
- The Enthusiastic High Five: This one goes all the way up, reaching for the sky. Think winning the State Fair chili cook-off level of excitement. Just be mindful of your partner's wingspan and potential shoulder dislocation.
- The Polite High Five: A quick handshake-height bump. Perfect for business meetings or when you're not exactly BFFs with the high-fiver.
So there you have it, folks! The mystery of the Dallas high five height may remain unsolved, but hopefully, this little exploration brought a smile to your face. Remember, the most important thing about a high five is the spirit behind it. So go forth, Dallas, and high five with reckless abandon (just maybe avoid those Stetsons).
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