Houston's Run Defense: From Turnstile to Turnstile Terminator?
Ah, the Houston Texans' run defense. A topic that used to inspire the comedic stylings of a mime trapped in a broken elevator. But fear not, dear reader, for those days are buried deeper than J.J. Watt's cleats. Let's take a victory lap through this tale of woe turned wonder.
Act I: The Colander Years
Let's be honest, the Texans' run defense used to be about as effective as a chocolate teapot stopping a runaway bus. Opposing running backs carved through them like a Thanksgiving turkey. It was a defensive masterclass in the art of letting people go places they shouldn't.
Act II: Enter DeMeco Ryans, Defender Supreme
Then came the cavalry, or rather, the sideline savior – DeMeco Ryans, the new head coach. This man's defensive schemes are tighter than a duck in tax season. Suddenly, the Texans' run defense transformed from a colander to a brick wall. Running backs found themselves bouncing off tackles like toddlers at a bouncy castle convention.
Act III: Numbers Don't Lie (Unless They're From Last Season)
Here's where things get really funny. The Texans went from worst in the league to, get this, one of the absolute best. We're talking sub-100 rushing yards allowed per game. Statisticians are still trying to figure out if that's a typo or a sign of the apocalypse.
So, How is Houston's Run Defense Now?
Well, buddy, that's the beauty of the offseason. Did they retain their defensive mastermind coordinator? Did they draft some run-stuffing linebackers with appetites bigger than Watt's sack celebration? These are mysteries yet to be unraveled, suspenseful cliffhangers that will leave you on the edge of your seat... well, maybe the edge of your recliner with a bag of chips.
One Thing's for Sure...
The Texans' run defense is no longer a laughing stock. It's a guarded optimism factory. Will they stay top-notch? Only time, training camp, and maybe a little divine intervention will tell. But one thing's for sure, it's a far cry from the comedy of errors it used to be.
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