The Great Illinois Assault Weapon Roundup: How Many Bang-Bang Boys (and Girls) Played by the Rules?
So, Illinois passed a law requiring folks to register their "assault weapons" by January 1st, 2024. Now, the question on everyone's lips (well, some everyone's lips) is: did they actually do it? Buckle up, because we're about to dive into the wild world of Illinois assault weapon registration.
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| How Many Assault Weapons Have Been Registered In Illinois |
The Big, Bold, Beautiful Number (or Not So Much)
As of January, the Illinois State Police reported a measly 29,357 people registering a whopping 68,992 assault weapons. That's like, a participation trophy kind of number considering there are over 2.5 million FOID card holders in the state. Seems some folks took the "register your guns" note with a grain of salt (or maybe a whole shotgun shell).
Where'd All the Rambos Go?
Let's be honest, the whole registration thing wasn't exactly met with cheers. Some counties said they wouldn't enforce it, and there were rumblings about legal challenges (which, surprise, surprise, there were). So, the big question is: where are all the unregistered assault weapons?
- Theory 1: Buried in the Backyard - Maybe people went all "National Treasure" and stashed their AR-15s under a cleverly disguised rose bush.
- Theory 2: Sold Out of State - Did everyone suddenly decide to become snowbirds in Florida and take their little black rifles with them for "gator protection"?
- Theory 3: The Great Parts Bin in the Sky - Maybe they disassembled everything and are waiting for the robot uprising to put it all back together (doubtful, but hey, stranger things have happened).
Truth be told, who knows exactly where all the unregistered assault weapons are. But one thing's for sure, this whole situation is about as clear as mud after a downpour.
FAQ: How to Not Get Lost in the Assault Weapon Registration Maze (Probably Too Late, But Here Goes Anyway)
How to: Actually Register a Weapon (if you haven't already)
Answer: Check the Illinois State Police website (https://isp.illinois.gov/Home/AssaultWeapons) for all the info and, you know, maybe do it (don't say we didn't warn ya).How to: Know if Your Gun is Considered an "Assault Weapon" (Because Apparently, it's Complicated)
Answer: The ISP has a handy-dandy guide (https://isp.illinois.gov/Home/AssaultWeapons), but be warned, it can make your head spin faster than a teacup ride at the state fair.How to: Deal with the Fact That Most People Didn't Register
Answer: Grab a bag of popcorn, settle in, and watch the legal drama unfold. It's gonna be a doozy.How to: Avoid Getting into Arguments About Gun Control on Social Media
Answer: Just don't. Seriously, it's not worth the headache. Go pet a dog or something.How to: Feel Like You Have Some Control Over This Crazy Situation
Answer: We wish we had an answer for this one. But hey, at least you can laugh (or cry) about it with this post, right?
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