The Chicago Bulls' 2023 Draft Picks: A Comedy of Errors (or Lack Thereof)
Ah, the Chicago Bulls' 2023 draft picks. A topic that brings as much excitement as watching paint dry...unless, of course, that paint is being hurled by a disgruntled DeMar DeRozan after the team somehow whiffs on another free throw.
But wait, you cry, desperate for a shred of hope! Didn't the Bulls have a shot at a decent pick this year?
Well, buckle up, buttercup, because this is where things get interesting (or, depending on your definition of interesting, incredibly frustrating).
The Plot Thickens (or Becomes Frustratingly Thin)
See, the Bulls, in a move of questionable brilliance, traded their first-round pick all the way back in 2021 to the Orlando Magic. This pick, however, wasn't just handed over like a stale bag of popcorn. Oh no, it came with a top-four protection clause. Basically, if the Bulls finished in the top four that year, they'd get their precious pick back.
Now, the Bulls did make a valiant effort to, you know, actually be good enough to keep their pick. They even dusted off their "defense is optional" playbook from the Jordan era for old time's sake. But alas, they fell just short, losing to the Miami Heat in a play-in tournament heartbreaker that would make Michael Jordan shed a single, solitary tear (probably).
So, what does this mean for the 2023 draft?
Well, if you're a Bulls fan hoping to see a shiny new rookie on the court, you're about as likely to spot a happy ending in a Kardashian marriage. The Bulls officially had zero picks in the 2023 draft. That's right, folks, they entered the draft with about as much enthusiasm as a sloth on a Tuesday afternoon.
But hey, there's always a silver lining, right? Maybe?
The Not-So-Silver Lining
On the bright side, this lack of draft picks means the Bulls have more cap space to potentially snag some free agents. The downside? Well, free agency is a fickle beast, and with the Bulls' recent track record, they're more likely to end up with a past-their-prime veteran than the next big thing.
So there you have it, folks. The Chicago Bulls' 2023 draft was a masterclass in...well, not much at all. But hey, at least they can look forward to the 2024 draft! Just remember, folks, hope is a dangerous thing.
