So You Think You've Spotted a Serial Killer in Illinois? How Worried Should You Be (Actually, Don't Be Worried, But Here's Some Fun Facts Anyway)
Let's face it, Illinois has a bit of a reputation when it comes to famous (or infamous) folks. From politicians with questionable dance moves to architects who brought us the enduring joy of strong winds through giant metal beans, Illinois knows how to make a name for itself. But there's another category that Illinois holds a surprising title in: serial killers.
That's right, Illinois has churned out its fair share of creepy crawlies who enjoyed bumping people off. Fun fact: According to some studies (by people who clearly have more time on their hands than the rest of us), Illinois ranks pretty high in the "serial killer per capita" category.
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But before you barricade yourself in your basement and stockpile canned goods (trust us, the Twinkies won't last), here's a reality check:
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- Serial killers are statistically rare. Like, winning-the-lottery rare.
- Most violent crime is not committed by serial killers. It's more likely you'll get into a disagreement with a squirrel over that last juicy acorn than become a serial killer's victim.
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| How Many Serial Killers Are From Illinois |
But Hey, Gotta Feed the Curiosity, Right? How Many Serial Killers Are We Talking About Here?
Now, the exact number of serial killers who ever graced Illinois with their presence is a bit fuzzy. There are confirmed cases, unconfirmed cases, cases that are just plain weird, and let's not forget the possibility that some folks are just really good at hiding bodies (looking at you, cornfields of central Illinois).
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Here's a ballpark figure: somewhere in the range of 40-70 confirmed serial killers. Shocking, right? Well, not really. Considering Illinois has a population over 12 million, that translates to a miniscule fraction of a fraction of a percent.
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Okay, Okay, You've Convinced Me, Serial Killers in Illinois Aren't That Big a Deal. But They Are Kind of Fascinating in a Morbid Way. Spill the Tea, Who Are These Notorious Characters?
If you're curious about the rogues gallery of Illinois's serial killer scene, you're in for a wild ride. From the socialite who poisoned her family for insurance money (because, let's face it, who hasn't considered it?) to the clown killer who preyed on young boys (seriously, what is it with creepy clowns?), Illinois has produced a murderers' row that would make even Stephen King blanch.
But a word to the wise: While some true-crime documentaries can be addictively creepy, don't lose sight of the fact that these were real people who lost their lives in horrific ways.
How To Stay Safe in Illinois (Spoiler Alert: It's Not Rocket Science)
- Use common sense. Don't walk alone at night in deserted areas, and trust your gut instinct if you feel unsafe.
- Lock your doors. This seems obvious, but you'd be surprised...
- Be aware of your surroundings. Don't walk around glued to your phone, oblivious to the world around you.
- Don't accept rides from strangers. Seriously, this should go without saying, but apparently, it needs to be said.
- Relax! The chances of encountering a serial killer are incredibly low. Enjoy all that Illinois has to offer, from the stunning beauty of the Shawnee National Forest to the deep-dish pizza that will clog your arteries in the best way possible.
So there you have it. Serial killers in Illinois: more myth than menace. But hey, if it keeps you on your toes and makes you lock your doors at night, then who are we to judge?
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