How Many Walmarts Does it Take to Screw in a Light Bulb in Houston, TX? (Spoiler: A Surprisingly Low Number)
Ah, Houston. The land of sprawling freeways, humidity that could knock you over, and, apparently, a whole lotta Walmarts. If you're new to this fair city, you might be wondering, just how many Walmarts are we talking about here? Enough to create a gravitational pull towards discounts? Enough to have its own zip code? Buckle up, because we're about to dive into the fascinating world of Houston Walmart density.
The Official Count: More Than You Think (But Not THAT Many)
According to Walmart's own store directory (which, let's face it, is probably the most reliable source on this topic), there are a cool 24 Walmarts scattered across the Houston landscape. That's a Walmart for every existential crisis you might have while wandering the cereal aisle at 3 am.
Now, 24 might sound like a lot, and for some folks, it probably is. But here's the thing: Houston is BIG. Like, really big. We're talking sprawl that would make Texas proud. So, while there's a decent chance you'll stumble upon a Walmart on your travels, it's not quite like they're replacing all the Whataburgers just yet (though, some might argue that's not such a bad thing).
The Unofficial Count: Probably More, But We're Not Counting Neighborhood Karens with Stockpiles
Let's be honest, Houston is a resourceful city. We've got folks who can turn a pool noodle into a car antenna and a lawn chair into a makeshift throne. So, it wouldn't surprise me if there were a few "unofficial" Walmarts lurking around town. You know, the ones in garages overflowing with discount laundry detergent and enough Ramen noodles to survive a zombie apocalypse.
But hey, no judgment. To each their own, and if having a personal Walmart in your garage brings you joy, then who am I to stop you? Just try to keep the noise down during your 2 am bargain bonanzas, alright? We all gotta sleep sometime (except maybe for those aforementioned 3 am cereal enthusiasts).
So, How Many Walmarts Does Houston Really Need?
That, my friend, is the million-dollar question (or perhaps the 24-Walmart question, in this case). The truth is, it probably depends on who you ask. Some folks might say there's never enough Walmart, while others might dream of a world with locally owned shops and artisanal cheese stands (hey, a dreamer can dream!).
Ultimately, the number of Walmarts in Houston is a testament to the city's love of convenience and, perhaps, a bulk-sized supply of everything from socks to sunscreen. But hey, at least you know you'll never be far from a bargain (or a existential crisis-induced cereal run).
