Snake Plissken's Age: Was He Too Old for This Stuff?
Let's face it, folks, Snake Plissken in Escape from New York is a total badass. Eye patch? Check. Snake tattoo on his belly? Absolutely. Gruff demeanor that could curdle milk? You betcha. But one question has plagued fans for decades: just how old was Kurt Russell when he brought this iconic anti-hero to life?
The Shocking Truth (Spoiler Alert: It's Not That Shocking)
Brace yourselves, because this might shatter your reality. Kurt Russell filmed Escape from New York in 1980, and the movie was released in 1981. Since he was born in 1951, that means Snake Plissken was saving the President (and possibly the world?) at the ripe old age of... drumroll please ...30 years old!
Hold on a Sec, Isn't New York a Maximum Security Prison for the REALLY Bad Guys?
Excellent point, my astute reader. You'd think surviving the cutthroat world of Manhattan turned mega-prison would require a bit more seasoning, right? Well, fear not. The film cleverly avoids giving us a clear picture of Plissken's criminal past. Maybe he was a prodigy in the art of scowling and eyepatch application? Perhaps his crimes involved impressive feats of parkour that landed him on the wrong side of the law? The beauty of Snake Plissken is the mystery, and frankly, we wouldn't want him any other way.
Wait, But the Movie Takes Place in 1997!
Ah, yes. The film takes some liberties with the timeline. Manhattan becomes a prison island in 1997, but filming magic brings us a 30-year-old Snake in a dystopian future. Let's just chalk it up to the timey-wimey shenanigans of a fictional universe, shall we?
So, What Does This Mean for Snake Plissken's Badassery?
Look, age ain't nothin' but a number when you've got the swagger of a thousand convicts. Snake Plissken pulls off his grizzled persona with aplomb, regardless of his actual birth certificate. He may not have been collecting a pension yet, but he was definitely schooling youngsters in the fine art of rescuing presidents from walled-off prisons.
How To Escape New York Yourself (Probably Not Recommended)
- How to master the eyepatch: Let's be honest, the eyepatch is 50% of the Snake Plissken look. Practice your smoldering gazes in the mirror until you can pierce the soul of a bodega cat.
- How to cultivate a permanent frown: This is an ongoing process, but hours spent watching paint dry can be a good starting point.
- How to develop mad parkour skills (without breaking your neck): Maybe start with some light jogging and gradually increase the difficulty. Parkour is best left to professionals, folks.
- How to become a master negotiator (so you can get a pardon): This requires excellent communication skills and the ability to see through people's BS. Maybe take a public speaking course?
- How to find a dystopian prison island to escape from (seriously, don't): This one's a bit tricky. Maybe stick to watching Escape from New York on repeat for your daily dose of thrills.
