So You've Got Yourself a Gopher Tortoise Tenant? Don't Evict, Co-Habitate!
Living in Florida is all about sunshine, beaches, and...gopher tortoises taking up residence in your backyard? Now, before you reach for the eviction notice, let's pump the brakes and appreciate the unique situation you've found yourself in. Because guess what? Gopher tortoises are actually a protected species, meaning they're about as likely to get a court order than, well, fit through your back door.
But fear not, fellow Floridian! Sharing your space with these prehistoric pals can be a delightful (and educational) experience. Here's a survival guide for turning your gopher tortoise into a roommate, not a roadblock.
First Impressions: It's Not a Hole, It's a Condo!
Those impressive mounds of dirt in your yard? That's not just an eyesore, it's a five-star tortoise condo complete with central burrow-ing (sorry, I couldn't resist). These intricate tunnels provide shelter, safety, and even a cool hangout for other critter like owls, snakes, and rabbits (who apparently don't mind a reptilian landlord).
Important Note: Don't be a bad neighbor and try to fill in the burrow. It's like collapsing your tenant's entire apartment building!
Living With a Prehistoric Roommate: Embrace the Zen
Gopher tortoises are chill. Like, really chill. They spend most of their days munching on leafy greens and basking in the sun, basically living the ultimate retirement plan. This translates to a low-maintenance roommate who won't blast heavy metal music at 3 AM (though the occasional munching might sound a bit like dubstep).
Pro Tip: Plant some native Florida vegetation around the burrow. It'll provide your gopher roommate with a gourmet salad bar and make your yard look more "Florida native" and less "tortoise buffet."
The Great Gopher Giveaway: Turning a Burden into Bragging Rights
Look at the bright side! Having a gopher tortoise on your property might actually be a good thing. These little guys are a keystone species, meaning their presence benefits a whole host of other wildlife. Plus, it's a guaranteed conversation starter at your next barbeque. Imagine the look on your neighbor's face when you say, "Oh, that? That's just Steve hanging out in his condo."
Be A Responsible Landlord: If you're planning any construction or landscaping, be sure to check with the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission (FWC) first. They can help you navigate the legalities of sharing your property with a protected species.
Gopher Tortoise FAQs:
How to get rid of gopher tortoises in Florida?
Easy answer: You can't! Gopher tortoises are protected.
How to keep gopher tortoises out of my yard?
The best way is to live and let live. They probably won't cause much trouble.
How to make friends with a gopher tortoise?
Respect their space and offer them a salad bar of native plants.
How to tell if a gopher tortoise is sick?
Look for signs of lethargy, discharge from the eyes or nose, or shell damage. Contact the FWC if you're concerned.
How to find out more about gopher tortoises?
The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission (FWC) is a great resource!