The Empire State: Mountains, Mayhem, and More! A Totally Serious Look at New York's Geography (Except Not Really)
Ah, New York. Land of dreams, bagels, and enough pigeons to deliver a Hitchcock film a heart attack. But what about the land itself, you ask? The bits that aren't covered in concrete and flashing lights? Well, buckle up, because New York's got a surprising amount of geographical variety, and it's about to get weird.
Mountains That Make Manhattan Blush
Upstate and Out There: Forget everything you think you know about New York. Yeah, yeah, the city's cool, but move north and you'll be greeted by the Adirondack Mountains, a sprawling wilderness with enough peaks to make a yodeler yodel with glee. We're talking Mount Marcy, the state's highest point, which, at a whopping 5,343 feet, will have you feeling like the king (or queen) of the world (until your phone dies and you realize you're hopelessly lost).
Catskillin' Around: But wait, there's more! The Catskill Mountains are another range that provide a dramatic backdrop for hiking, skiing, and staring out at the beauty of nature in confusion (because, let's face it, city folk and mountains don't always mix).
Bodies of Water: Not Just for Hot Dogs After Yankees Games
The Hudson Hustle: New York's got rivers, folks, and the granddaddy of them all is the Hudson. This historic waterway stretches from the Adirondacks all the way down to New York City, where it creates a giant natural harbor that's basically a swimming pool for very large boats. Just don't fall in. Trust me.
The Great Lake Escape: Upstate New York also boasts sections of Lakes Erie and Ontario, perfect for chilling on the beach and pretending you're somewhere tropical (because hey, denial is a river in Egypt, and sometimes you gotta float on it).
Niagara Falls: Nature's Most Powerful Shower We can't forget Niagara Falls, the face-melting cascade of wonder that straddles the border between New York and Canada. Witness its magnificence, but remember, raincoats are for wusses. True New Yorkers get soaked to the bone and emerge triumphant (or shivering uncontrollably, but that's beside the point).
Don't Forget the Flat Bits!
Long Island Lowlands: Okay, so not everything in New York is a mountain or a raging river. Long Island is a giant sandbar that provides some much-needed flat space for people who get dizzy looking up. It's also where the Hamptons are, so... ♂️
Empire State of Mind... Your Business Look, New York's got a lot going on geographically. From mountains that make skyscrapers weep to enough water to fill a truly gargantuan bathtub, it's a state with personality. So, the next time you think New York, think beyond the city and get ready to explore the wild (and wonderful) bits that nature has blessed this state with.
How to Get Your Geography On in New York: FAQ
How to Hike the Adirondacks: Don't be a fool, go with a guide. This ain't Central Park.
How to Sail the Hudson: Unless you're a salty sea dog, maybe stick to a tour boat. The Hudson can be tricky.
How to See Niagara Falls Without Getting Drenched: There's this thing called a raincoat. Look it up.
How to Avoid Getting Lost in Upstate New York: Cell service? What cell service? Pack a map (and maybe a compass, you never know).
How to Enjoy New York's Geography on a Budget: Hiking boots, a tent, and a love of the outdoors. That's all you really need (except maybe bug spray. Lots of bug spray).