People are currently reading this guide.
Mount Vernon or Mount Olympus? What if Washington Became King?
We all know George Washington – the stoic general, the reluctant politician, the guy on the dollar bill with suspiciously rosy cheeks. But what if, instead of leading the charge for democracy, he decided to swap the tricorn hat for a crown? Buckle up, because we're about to rewrite history in the most majestic (and slightly absurd) way possible.
Pros and Cons of a King George (Washington, that is):
Tip: Focus more on ideas, less on words.
- Pro: Stability McStabilityface – Let's face it, the early days of the United States were a tad chaotic. A King Washington could have provided some much-needed leadership and continuity.
- Con: Adios, Democracy! The whole point of the revolution was to ditch the monarchy thing, so a crown on Washington's head would've been a major buzzkill for the Founding Fathers (and a history teacher's worst nightmare).
- Pro: Cherry on Top – Washington's legendary honesty might have meant less political backstabbing and corruption. Imagine a government where everyone tells the truth (except maybe for a little white lie about chopping down that cherry tree).
- Con: Royal Fashion Faux Pas – Can you picture Washington in tights and a powdered wig? Shudder. Dude rocked the tricorn hat, but a full-on royal getup might have been a fashion disaster.
QuickTip: Compare this post with what you already know.
 |
| What If Washington Became King |
Potential Palace Intrigue:
Reminder: Revisit older posts — they stay useful.
- Martha Washington – Queen Martha the Magnificent? – Would Martha have embraced the royal life? Picture her throwing epic colonial tea parties and schooling foreign dignitaries on the finer points of biscuit baking.
- Royal Rivals: – Jefferson, Adams, and the rest of the Founding Father crew might have gotten a serious case of green eye over Washington's crown. Imagine pamphlets with titles like "Is King George the Real Power Grabber?"
The American Revolution: The Royal Rumble Edition
Tip: Read at your own pace, not too fast.
 |
- Instead of "Yankee Doodle," the colonists might have sung "God Save the King (George, Specifically)."
- Taxation without representation? More like royal decrees with a side of mandatory ballroom dancing lessons.
How about a democratic compromise? Maybe Washington becomes King… for life (but not really a king). This way, he gets the respect and authority, but the colonies keep their fledgling republic.
FAQ: Washington's Reign of Whimsy
- How to address the King? "Your Majesty," "Generalissimo Washington," or just "Hey, Georgie." (The last one might not go over well.)
- Would there be jousting tournaments? Only if they involved throwing horseshoes instead of lances.
- What would be the national anthem? A stirring rendition of "Hail Columbia" with a mandatory air guitar solo.
- Would there be a royal court? Of course! But instead of gossiping nobles, it would be filled with wrangling politicians and the occasional disgruntled farmer with a bone to pick about taxes.
- Would Washington be a good king? Knowing his dedication and leadership skills, probably. But let's hope he wouldn't get too comfortable on that throne – after all, the best part of George Washington is that he actually gave up power.
 |
