Houston PD: Don't Panic, But Here's How Not to Get Arrested While Trying to Find Their Number
Let's face it, Houston is a big ol' metropolis, and sometimes, even the best of us end up in a situation where we need to contact the Po-Po. But hold on to your cowboy hats, folks, because finding the Houston Police Department's number can feel like navigating a rodeo clown obstacle course.
Don't Call Batman (Unless You See a Bat-Signal)
First things first, unless you witness a giant bat-symbol emblazoned across the sky, calling Batman is probably not the most effective course of action. While we appreciate the sentiment, Jim Gordon might be a little busy in Gotham.
The Key is Knowing When to Dial 911 (and When Not to)
Now, if you're facing a true emergency – a bank robbery in progress, your neighbor's emu on the loose (it happens!), or someone trying to steal your perfectly seasoned queso – that's a 911 situation. Don't hesitate, dial those digits faster than you can say "yeehaw!"
But here's the thing, maybe you just misplaced your keys again (squirrel!), or your overenthusiastic nephew accidentally set off the smoke alarm with a particularly vigorous game of hide-and-seek. For those non-emergency situations, the Houston PD has a special hotline, folks.
Enter the Not-So-Secret (But Maybe a Little Secretive) Number
Now, buckle up because this is where things get interesting. The number for non-emergency Houston PD services is (713) 884-3131. Write it down on a napkin, etch it on your forehead – whatever it takes to remember this magical string of digits.
Pro Tip: Calling this number won't make you sound any less dramatic when you retell the story later. You can still say things like, "So there I was, facing down a rogue emu..." We won't judge.
Houston PD: We've Got Your Back (Unless You're Actually a Wanted Criminal)
So, there you have it, folks! The not-so-secret secret to reaching Houston's finest. Remember, they're there to serve and protect (and maybe help you wrangle the occasional emu). But for the love of all things Texan, use the right number, and unless you're on the run from the law (in which case, this article probably wasn't that helpful), you'll be just fine.
