Unearthing the Silurian Sensation: How Madame Vastra Slithered into Victorian London
Let's face it, Victorian London wasn't exactly known for its diversity. You had your stuffy gentlemen with their top hats, your corseted ladies fainting at the sight of an ankle, and of course, the ever-present fog. But then, something extraordinary slithered onto the scene: Madame Vastra, the glamorous lizard-lady detective.
A Tunnel Vision Takeover: The Rude Awakening
Now, Vastra wasn't exactly booking a holiday flat on Airbnb. No, our Silurian friend was rudely awakened from her centuries-long nap by the raucous racket of the London Underground being built. Let's just say, she wasn't best pleased to find her cozy underground lair being replaced with a noisy tunnel.
Fun Fact: Turns out, waking up a grumpy lizard-woman after a long sleep isn't the best idea. There were some... misunderstandings involving pickaxes and five unfortunate commuters.
The Doctor Steps In: From Fury to Friendship
Thankfully, before things got too Jurassic Park-ish, the ever-so-charming Doctor waltzed in. Now, the Doctor has a knack for diffusing tense situations (usually involving sonic screwdrivers and witty banter). He managed to calm Vastra down with tales of time travel and far-off planets.
We can only imagine the conversation:
Doctor: "So, you're telling me you've been napping for millions of years and woke up to find your home under construction?"
Vastra: (eyes narrowed) "Precisely. And these... 'humans' seem none too pleased about a Silurian sharing their subterranean space."
Doctor: (with a roguish grin) "Well, why not integrate? Victorian London could use a touch of reptilian resourcefulness. Besides, I hear the hats are simply divine this season."
From Cavern to Cravat: The Rise of a Detective
And integrate she did! Vastra, with her sharp intellect and natural camouflage abilities, became a celebrated detective. She set up shop at 13 Paternoster Row, right next to the Doctor's occasional flat, and became a legend.
Who knew a lizard-lady could rock a cravat so well?
So there you have it! The tale of how Madame Vastra, a grumpy but brilliant Silurian, found herself amidst the bustle of Victorian London. It's a story of grumpy awakenings, unexpected friendships, and proving that even lizard-people can become detective icons.
Frequently Asked Vastra-ous Questions:
How to make friends with a grumpy lizard-lady?
- Patience is key. Remember, they've been napping for a very long time.
- Offer them tea. Preferably strong tea.
- Maybe avoid waking them up with construction work.
How to impress a Silurian detective?
- A good puzzle always goes down well.
- Knowledge of reptilian history is a plus.
- A truly killer hat never hurts.
How to tell if you've woken up a Silurian?
- Check for tunnels in your basement.
- Unexplained missing pickaxes are a bad sign.
- If you hear someone hissing about the audacity of humans, you might be in trouble.
