So You Want to Take Down Big Ben's Big Brother? A Totally Unofficial Guide to Beating the London Monitor
Ah, the London Monitor. A charming chap, really. Stomps around London like it owns the place, raining down machine gun fire and generally giving the locals a bad case of the robo-blues. But fear not, intrepid resistance fighter! With a little know-how and a whole lot of moxie, you can turn this oversized tin can into scrap metal.
Step 1: Don't Get Turned into Swiss Cheese
This might seem obvious, but avoiding the London Monitor's various "party favors" is key. Those machine guns? Not exactly designed for tickles. The giant laser beam? More of a "don't look directly at it" situation. Those adorable little rockets? Well, let's just say they have a surprising knack for ruining your day.
Here's the motto: Stay mobile, utilize those handy underground tunnels, and peek out only when necessary. Think of yourself as a particularly grumpy badger playing a deadly game of peek-a-boo with a skyscraper-sized robot.
Step 2: Eye of the Tiger (or Laser)
The London Monitor has a weak spot, and it's about as subtle as a neon sign that says "SHOOT HERE." That glowing red eye? That's your ticket to robot-crushing victory. But here's the catch: Mr. Monitor isn't exactly keen on target practice. You'll need to wait for the eye to open, then unleash a single, well-placed laser blast from your trusty Laserkraftwerk.
Remember: Patience is key. A single, precise shot is better than a flurry of missed ones.
Step 3: Tickle the Underbelly (Seriously, Don't)
Once you've gotten the London Monitor to open its metaphorical eyes (and then promptly shut them again in pain), it'll unleash a volley of rockets. Dodge these miniature hellspawn with the grace of a professional ballerina (or, you know, by frantically sprinting for cover). Here's the important part: destroy those rocket launchers! A few well-placed laser blasts should do the trick.
Pro-Tip: Don't get greedy. Take out two or three launchers at a time, then retreat back to the safety of the tunnels.
Step 4: The Grand Finale: Operation "Robo-Stomp"
With the rocket launchers out of commission, it's time for the main event! Here's where things get a little...dicey. You'll need to lure the London Monitor close, then sprint underneath it. Yes, underneath a giant, angry robot. Don't worry, it's perfectly safe (if by "safe" you mean "incredibly dangerous but totally awesome").
Once you're safely positioned, look up. You should see a glowing weak point on the underside. Blast it with your Laserkraftwerk, then hightail it back to the tunnels before Mr. Monitor decides to take a spontaneous victory jig (which involves a lot of foot stomping). Repeat this process a few times, and with any luck, the London Monitor will be nothing but a pile of smoldering scrap.
Congratulations! You've just dethroned the king of the robo-hill! Now, go forth and celebrate your victory with a nice cup of tea (or, perhaps, a well-deserved victory dance on top of the London Monitor's mangled remains).
FAQ: London Monitor Squashing 101
- How to Avoid Machine Gun Fire? Simple! Don't stand in the line of fire. Utilize cover, be unpredictable, and maybe invest in a really good dodgeball coach.
- How to Destroy the Rocket Launchers? A few well-placed laser blasts should do the trick. Just remember, patience is key, and don't get greedy!
- How to Get Underneath the London Monitor? This might sound like a bad idea (and it kind of is), but it's the only way to reach its weak point. Just be prepared for some serious robot-induced claustrophobia.
- How Many Times Do I Need to Blast the Weak Point? A few good shots should do the trick. But remember, this is a giant robot we're talking about. Maybe bring a spare laser cartridge, just in case.
- How Do I Celebrate My Victory? Tea and biscuits are always a good option. Or, you know, you could always give the London Monitor a playful little kick (just to be sure it stays down).
