The Existential Crisis of a Squirrel: How Long Do These Bushy-tailed Buzzsaws Live in Ontario?
Ever wondered what goes on in the mind of a squirrel frantically burying an acorn twice its size? Maybe they're contemplating the meaning of life, the universe, and everything? Or perhaps they're just freaking out about their dwindling life expectancy in the harsh Canadian wilderness (or your bird feeder, depending on your perspective).
Here's the nutty truth about squirrel lifespans in Ontario: it's a mixed bag.
 |
| How Long Do Squirrels Live In Ontario |
The Great Squirrel Divide: Nature vs. Nurture
Wild Scampering Squad: Out in the wild, Ontario squirrels are like furry ninjas, constantly dodging predators, battling the elements, and facing the ever-present threat of...well, us (we'll get to that later). This rough and tumble life means their lifespans are shorter than their pampered park-bench cousins. We're talking somewhere in the ballpark of 3-4 years on average, though some scrappy survivors can reach a valiant 10 years.
Park Bench Barons: Ah, the squirrels of suburbia. These cheeky chaps have figured out the good life. They score free rent in your attic, buffet-style meals from your forgetful bird feeder neighbors, and basically zero predators besides the occasional overzealous house cat. This cushy existence translates to a longer lifespan, with some posh park squirrels living up to a luxurious 10 years.
Important side note: While squirrels can technically reach 20 years in captivity, that's like comparing your life to a billionaire living on a private island. Not exactly relatable to the average Ontario squirrel.
QuickTip: Slow down if the pace feels too fast.
The Squirrel's Greatest Threat: Us (Unintentionally)
Okay, so we aren't exactly out there hunting squirrels with shotguns (though some brave souls might chase them with a well-placed broom). However, our well-meaning efforts to co-exist can sometimes backfire. Here's how we might be shortening squirrel lifespans (completely by accident, of course):
- Roadkill: Those little grey streaks across the road? Yeah, that's not always just a discarded banana peel. Cars are a major threat to squirrels, especially in urban areas.
- Habitat Loss: As our cities sprawl, we're slowly taking over squirrel territory. This means less space for them to find food and shelter, making life a little tougher.
So, what can we do to help? Well, that's a question for another day. For now, let's move on to some frequently asked questions about these furry little Canadians.
Tip: Avoid distractions — stay in the post.
 |
How-To Squirrel FAQs:
1. How to tell how old a squirrel is? Unless you're a squirrel dentist (which is a very specific and likely non-existent profession), this is nearly impossible. Best to just appreciate them for the fluffy bundles of chaotic energy they are.
2. How to encourage squirrels to live in my yard? Plant some nut-bearing trees and keep your bird feeder well-stocked (just be sure to use squirrel-proof feeders if you also have bird-loving neighbors).
QuickTip: Pay attention to first and last sentences.
3. How to get squirrels to leave my attic? This requires a more delicate approach. Consult a wildlife removal specialist – they'll help you get those furry freeloaders out without harming them (or yourself).
4. How to befriend a squirrel? This might be a fool's errand. Squirrels are wild animals, and befriending them is about as likely as convincing your cat to share its food. Enjoy their antics from a safe distance.
Tip: Make mental notes as you go.
5. How to know if a squirrel has rabies? Rabid squirrels will exhibit unusual behavior like disorientation, aggression, or paralysis. If you suspect rabies, contact animal control immediately.
 |
💡 This page may contain affiliate links — we may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you.
