San Antonio in 2023: Hold My Sweet Tea, It's Hotter Than Grandma's Grits!
Ah, 2023 in San Antonio. A year best remembered for two things: The Alamo (probably) and the never-ending inferno that was summer. If you think Texas summers are usually toasty, buckle up, buttercup, because 2023 decided to crank the heat to "nuclear oven."
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| How Many Consecutive 100 Degree Days In San Antonio 2023 |
The Great Scorch of '23: A Streak So Hot, It Could Fry a Cactus
We all know San Antonio gets its fair share of scorchers, but 2023 took things to a whole new level. The city broke the record for most consecutive days of 100-degree weather, searing in at a whopping 23 days in a row. That's right, folks, for over three weeks, it was hotter than a dragon's breath contest. Imagine pool noodles turning into limp pool linguine, and the only sound being the collective whine of air conditioners working overtime.
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This record-breaking streak wasn't the only shocker. San Antonio also shattered the record for the total number of 100-degree days in a year, clocking in at a sizzling 60 days. That's more triple-digit days than most Texans have belt loops on their jeans!
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So, How Bad Did It Really Get?
Let's paint a picture:
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- Wildlife: Lizards were spotted wearing sunglasses, and the armadillos were begging for raincoats.
- Fashion Trends: Forget sundresses, the new must-have accessory was a gallon jug of water permanently attached to your hip.
- Local News Headlines: "Man Attempts to Fry Egg on Sidewalk, Achieves Perfect Sunny-Side Up"
Honestly, it got so hot, even the ghosts in the Alamo were sweating.
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But Hey, At Least We Broke Some Records, Right?
Sure, the relentless heat wave may have been enough to make even the most seasoned Texan shed a tear (or two, or three), but hey, at least we made history! Maybe we can get a giant foam finger shaped like a thermometer for our troubles?
How to Survive a San Antonio Summer (Because Apparently We Need a Refresher Course)
Here are some quick tips for staying cool when the mercury soars:
- Hydrate, Hydrate, Hydrate! Water is your BFF, people. Carry a gallon jug everywhere you go.
- Seek Air-Conditioned Refuge: Malls, libraries, your neighbor's house with the central AC blasting – find your happy place and camp out.
- Become Nocturnal: Embrace the vampire lifestyle. Nights are cooler, and who needs sleep anyway, right?
- Invest in a Pool Noodle Float: It's the only way you'll be able to tell the difference between your pool noodle and a limp pool noodle.
There you have it, folks! A crash course in San Antonio's fiery summer of 2023. Here's hoping 2024 brings a little more mercy from the sun gods.
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