Body Count with Georgia Miller: A Deep Dive (Maybe Not That Deep)
Ah, Georgia Miller. The belle of Wellsbury with a smile that could melt glaciers and a secret past colder than Siberia. One minute she's baking the perfect apple pie, the next she's...well, let's just say her charm extends beyond the PTA bake sale. But the question that plagues viewers like a rogue pecan in a perfectly symmetrical pecan pie: how many bodies does Georgia have buried in her colorful history?
The Known Victims (That We Know Of)
Kenny "Stepdad From Heck" Drescher: Let's just say Kenny wasn't exactly Father of the Year material. Seems Georgia cooked him up a special batch of worm-infused brownies (don't ask) to protect her daughter, Ginny, from his unwelcome advances. Motherhood: it's a killer! (Figuratively, please don't call CPS).
Anthony "Where'd He Go?" Green: Georgia's first husband. We don't see the deed done (thank goodness for network television), but his disappearance coincides with a sudden windfall for Georgia. Coincidence? We think not.
Cynthia "Too Kind for This World" Fuller: This one's a bit of a heartbreaker. Cynthia, Georgia's frenemy turned (almost) friend, was on the verge of leaving her abusive husband. Georgia, ever the problem solver, "helped" Cynthia out by, ahem, permanently checking the poor guy out. Intentions? Good. Execution? Well, let's just say Georgia might need some anger management classes.
The Body Count Verdict: Three and Counting?
So, the current tally stands at a neat three. But is that all? Georgia's past is shrouded in more mystery than a Scooby Doo episode. There's a reason she keeps moving from town to town, and chances are there are a few more skeletons rattling around in her closet (metaphorically speaking, of course).
Stay tuned, folks! As Ginny gets closer to the truth, we might just get a front-row seat to more of Georgia's not-so-wholesome hobbies.
How-To FAQ for Georgia Wannabes (Don't Actually Be Like Georgia)
How to get away with murder? Don't. Seriously, don't. It's messy and illegal.
How to bake the perfect apple pie? Master the crust first. Flaky and golden is key.
How to deal with a bad stepfather? Talk to a trusted adult or call a helpline. There are people who can help.
How to move to a new town and start fresh? Pack light and be prepared to answer a lot of questions about your mysterious past. (Unless you're Georgia, then pack heavy because you might need a shovel).
How to be a good mom? Love your kids unconditionally, be honest with them, and maybe lay off the homicidal tendencies.