The Michigan Wolverines: Ranked Team Slayers or Ranking Reclusive Hermits?
The University of Michigan Wolverines football team. Fearsome. Maize and Blue clad warriors. National Champions in 2023 (we'll never let you forget that, Washington!). But one question has been nagging fans and analysts alike: just how many ranked teams did these gridiron gladiators actually vanquish?
Separating Fact from Fan Fiction
Now, some overzealous maize and blue diehards might have you believe Michigan steamrolled a conga line of top-25 teams on their way to the championship. While their dominance was undeniable, a touch of reality is needed.
Here's the truth, folks: nailing down the exact number of ranked teams Michigan beat depends on which week's rankings you use. The Associated Press (AP) and Coaches Polls are the big kahunas in college football rankings, and sometimes they disagree – like arguing over the merits of deep dish vs. thin crust pizza (thin crust all the way, fight me).
But fear not, intrepid reader! Here's a breakdown to soothe your stats-loving soul:
- Conservative Cathy: Using the final AP Poll rankings, Michigan dispatched a respectable 3 ranked foes.
- Bold Barbara: If you go by the Coaches Poll, then Michigan can boast about conquering a mighty 4 ranked teams.
So, How Many Ranked Teams Did They REALLY Beat?
The answer, like that perfect spiral on a touchdown pass, is somewhere in the middle. Let's call it a solid 3.5 ranked teams.
Michigan may not have set a record for ranked-team takedowns, but they certainly proved they could handle the heat against the college football elite. Remember, folks, quality over quantity!
Bonus: Fun Facts That May or May Not Be Entirely True
- Michigan players developed a special handshake for every ranked team they beat. This resulted in some very creatively awkward handshakes by the end of the season.
- Opposing teams strategically scheduled dental appointments the week before playing Michigan to avoid the wrath of the Wolverines' ferocious defense.
- Scientists are still studying the existence of a "ranked-team-beating aura" that surrounded Michigan Stadium in 2023.
How To FAQs:
How to impress a Michigan Wolverines fan?
- A: Learn to say "Go Blue!" with genuine enthusiasm.
- B: Offer them a pasty (a delicious meat hand pie, not a political mishap).
How to avoid a Michigan Wolverines fan after a loss?
- A: Hide in a metaphorical bunker.
- B: Learn to recite the fight song, "The Victors," flawlessly. This may appease them slightly.
How to convince a Michigan Wolverines fan that deep dish pizza is superior?
- A: This is a fool's errand. Don't even try.
- B: Offer to buy them a slice (or two, or three) of deep dish. A full stomach can soften hearts (and maybe minds?).
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