Melbourne's Empty Homes: A Census of Ghosts (and Maybe a Few Hipsters with Second Cribs)
So, you've heard whispers of Melbourne being haunted by... unoccupied dwellings? Fear not, intrepid housing market explorer! We're here to crack the code on how many vacant homes haunt this fair city.
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| How Many Vacant Homes In Melbourne |
The Big Numbers: Enough Space for a Small Army (of Koalas?)
The Australian Bureau of Statistics (ABS), those lovely folks counting everything from snags on the barbie to (apparently) empty houses, tells us around 10% of Melbourne's dwellings were vacant on census night in 2021. That translates to roughly 80,000 empty properties, according to a report by Prosper Australia (although some argue the true number might be higher).
Hold on, isn't 10% a bit, well, spooky? Not necessarily. Here's the thing: vacant doesn't always equal haunted (or a potential investment opportunity). Some of these empty cribs could be:
QuickTip: Use the post as a quick reference later.
- In between tenants: You snooze, you lose that rent money, but you also don't want a new tenant moving in with yesterday's lasagna still bubbling in the oven.
- Holiday homes: Because who doesn't dream of a place to store your surfboard and existential dread between epic beach trips?
- Investment properties undergoing renovations: Unless you're a fan of exposed brick and a complete lack of, well, everything, a fresh coat of paint might take some time.
Why Should You Care About Empty Homes? (Besides the Spooky Factor)
Okay, so maybe Melbourne isn't overrun by tumbleweeds and creepy abandoned houses. But vacant properties can still be a bit of a buzzkill for the housing market:
- Tightening supply: With fewer rentals available, vacancy rates drop, and rent prices go up... faster than your rent cheque arrives in your inbox.
- Landlord limbo: If a bunch of properties are sitting empty, it can signal a disconnect between what landlords are asking and what renters are willing to pay.
But hey, there's always a silver lining! Maybe all these empty homes mean there's room for a giant ball pit in the middle of the city. Just sayin'.
QuickTip: Let each idea sink in before moving on.
Frequently Asked Vacant Abode Inquiries:
How to find a vacant home? Unfortunately, there's no ghost realtor app (yet). Your best bet is to stick to the usual channels – real estate agents, online rental listings, and maybe a strategically placed "Rent Me" sign on your balcony.
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How to turn a vacant home into a haunted house? Easy! Just neglect the yard work, crank up the spooky sound effects, and maybe invest in a fog machine. Don't forget the cobwebs!
QuickTip: The more attention, the more retention.
How to convince your landlord the vacant apartment next door isn't haunted? Try offering to help with the open house – dressing up as a friendly ghost might break the ice (and maybe get you a discount on rent).
How to lobby for policies to address vacant homes? Contact your local councilor and express your concerns. There might even be existing initiatives you can support.
Tip: Read actively — ask yourself questions as you go.
How to cope with the existential dread of a seemingly never-ending housing crisis? Distract yourself with cute animal videos. It's a well-known coping mechanism, trust us.
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