So You Wanna Be a Georgian? A Guide to Joining the Khinkali Crew
Ever dreamt of raising a toast with a glass of saperavi (Georgian red wine) while yelling "Gaumarjos!" (cheers!) with the locals? Maybe you're just tired of explaining why your country doesn't have khachapuri (cheesy Georgian bread, it's life-changing, trust me). Whatever your reason, becoming a Georgian citizen sounds pretty darn appealing. But how exactly does one snag that coveted Georgian passport? Well, my friend, fret no more! Buckle up for a hilarious (and semi-factual) journey through the options.
How To Get Georgia Citizenship |
Option 1: The Blood Ties Brigade
This is the easiest route, folks. Bold Georgian blood coursing through your veins? Congratulations! You're practically a citizen already. Just don't expect parades or confetti cannons. These guys are pretty chill.
Option 2: The Investment Hustle
QuickTip: Pause when something feels important.
Feeling fancy? Got some cash burning a hole in your pocket? Georgia's got a citizenship-by-investment program. Shell out a cool $300,000, invest it in a local company (think fancy cheese shops or, you know, actual cheese production facilities), and voila! You're on your way to becoming a cheese tycoon...and a Georgian citizen! Just remember, patience is key. You gotta hang tight for 10 years before you can officially claim your khinkali-loving status.
Option 3: The Lovebirds' Loophole
Found yourself smitten with a charming Georgian? Look, we can't blame you. Snag yourself a Georgian spouse, wait a couple of years (gotta make sure it's the real deal, lovebirds!), and you might just be eligible to apply for citizenship. Bonus points if you can serenade your significant other with a soulful rendition of a Georgian folk song.
QuickTip: Absorb ideas one at a time.
Option 4: The 10-Year Test
This is the ultimate Georgian citizenship gauntlet. Think you've got the grit? Ten years of legal residency in Georgia is no joke. You gotta master the Georgian language (those consonants are tricky!), prove your knowledge of Georgian history and customs (learning the ancient toast-making traditions is essential), and convince the powers that be that you're a valuable addition to Georgian society. Basically, you gotta become basically Georgian.
So, How Do I Become a Georgian Citizen?
Here's a quick FAQ to get you started:
Tip: Read in a quiet space for focus.
How to become a Georgian citizen through blood ties?
Be born to a Georgian parent. Easy peasy.
How to become a Georgian citizen through investment?
Invest $300,000, wait 10 years, and hope you don't get hangry in the meantime (all that khachapuri will help).
How to become a Georgian citizen through marriage?
QuickTip: Reread tricky spots right away.
Find love, wait a while, and prove it's the real deal. Bonus points for bad Georgian karaoke.
How to become a Georgian citizen through residency?
Live there for 10 years, become Georgian basically.
How to become a Georgian citizen the quickest way?
Befriend a time traveler and convince them to take you back to when Georgia was giving out citizenships like candy. (Disclaimer: This is entirely fictional and not recommended.)