The Georgia Guidestones: A Message From Beyond (or Maybe Just From A Really Organized Hippie)
You've seen the memes, maybe even stumbled upon a conspiracy theory video or two. Those giant granite slabs standing out in the middle of Georgia, all cryptic and mysterious. Well, fret no more, truth seekers of the internet, because we're about to crack the code of the Georgia Guidestones, and let me tell you, it's a trip.
What Do The Georgia Guidestones Say |
Originally Built to Outlast Your Dishes
Erected in 1980, the Guidestones were shrouded in secrecy from the start. A guy under the pseudonym Robert C. Christian commissioned them, wanting to leave a message for humanity that would withstand nuclear war, meteor showers, and your average teenager with a can of spray paint. The message itself is etched in eight different languages, so basically, it's like the Rosetta Stone, but for folks who are really into sustainable population control.
QuickTip: Focus more on the ‘how’ than the ‘what’.
The 10 Guidestones of Maybe-Not-So-Silent-Disco
So, what exactly does this granite instruction manual for the future say? Buckle up, because it's a mix of the vaguely inspirational and the slightly bonkers:
QuickTip: Repeat difficult lines until they’re clear.
- Maintain humanity under 500,000,000 in perpetual balance with nature. (Apparently, Thanos was onto something?)
- Guide reproduction wisely — improving fitness and diversity. (Eugenics with a yoga twist?)
- Unite humanity with a living new language. (Dibs on calling it "Globish"!)
- Rule Passion — Faith — Tradition — and all things with tempered reason. (So, basically, chill out, everyone?)
- Protect people and nations with fair laws and just courts. (We can all agree on this one, right?)
- Let all nations rule internally resolving external disputes in a world court. (The U.N. on steroids?)
- Avoid petty laws and useless officials. (Can we get an amen?)
- Balance personal rights with social duties. (No more littering... and also, maybe share your fries?)
- Prize truth — beauty — love — seeking harmony with the infinite. (This one sounds like it was written after a particularly blissful meditation session.)
- Be not a cancer on the Earth — Leave room for nature — Leave room for nature. (Look, we get it, nature is important. Maybe lay off the avocado toast?)
So, what's the deal with these Guidestones?
Honestly, who knows? The mystery surrounding their creator and their, ahem, interesting message, has made them a magnet for conspiracy theorists and internet jokesters alike. But hey, they're a conversation starter, and isn't that what humanity is all about? Debating the meaning of life, one mysterious granite slab at a time.
Tip: Look for examples to make points easier to grasp.
How To Georgia Guidestone
You might be wondering how you can get involved in this whole Guidestone thing. Well, fret no more, because we've got the answers:
Tip: Take a sip of water, then continue fresh.
- How to Visit the Guidestones: Sadly, these towering testaments to population control were damaged in an explosion in July 2022. The future of the Guidestones is uncertain.
- How to Decipher the Guidestones: The message is written in eight languages, so brush up on your Esperanto or Sanskrit!
- How to Live by the Guidestones: Maintaining humanity under 500 million might be a tough one, but hey, recycling and using reusable grocery bags is a start, right?
- How to Build Your Own Guidestones: Granite is expensive, my friend. Maybe try a vision board instead?
- How to Not Get Lost in Conspiracy Theories About the Guidestones: Just remember, they're mostly a monument to one man's vision for the future, not a secret message from lizard people. Probably.