The Great Seattle Fire: From Glue Pot to Inferno in One Easy Step (Almost)
Ah, Seattle. Emerald City, land of grunge and drizzle, and apparently, according to history, a place where a simple glue pot party got a little out of hand. That's right, folks, the Great Seattle Fire of 1889 wasn't started by a disgruntled dragon or a rogue firework gone rogue (although that would be way cooler). Nope, the culprit was something far less mythical: glue.
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| How Did The Great Seattle Fire Start |
The Great Googly-Moogly Glue Incident of '89
It all went down on a sunny afternoon, June 6th to be exact. John Back, just your average joe (or should we say John Doe?) was working at Clairmont's woodworking shop, minding his own beeswax (or should we say wood shavings?). He needed some glue heated up, so he whipped out his trusty gasoline-powered glue pot. Now, gasoline and open flames are generally not the best BFFs, but hey, hindsight is 20/20, especially when you're looking back from a burning city.
Things went south faster than a greased pig on roller skates (apparently that was a popular saying back then). The glue overflowed like a pot of overenthusiastic macaroni and cheese, and those hot, sticky drippings landed right on a floor generously coated with wood chips and turpentine. Oops.
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John, bless his heart, tried to douse the flames with water. But as anyone who's ever tried to put out a grease fire with water knows, that's about as effective as using a feather to tickle a bear. The fire, fueled by the flammable floor and a healthy dose of bad luck, took off faster than a Seattleite trying to snag a window seat at a coffee shop.
The Fire That Wouldn't Quit
And so began the Great Seattle Fire. The flames, happy to find themselves surrounded by a tinderbox of wooden buildings and bone-dry summer conditions, roared through the city like a hungry dragon with a serious case of heartburn. A nearby liquor store decided to join the party a little too enthusiastically, exploding and sending flaming booze missiles everywhere.
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Seattle's fire department, bless their valiant efforts, was about as useful as a chocolate teapot in a blizzard. The water supply was weak, the fire hydrants were few and far between, and the buildings were practically built out of kindling. By the time the fire finally ran out of steam 18 hours later, it had devoured over 30 blocks, leaving a path of destruction that would have made Godzilla jealous.
The good news? No dragons were harmed in the making of this disaster.
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The bad news? Seattle pretty much had to start from scratch.
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But hey, sometimes a little fiery destruction can be a good thing. Seattle rebuilt bigger and better, learning valuable lessons about fire safety (like, maybe using non-explosive glue) and fire codes (like, having more than two fire hydrants for the entire city).
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FAQ: How to Not Start Your Own Great Fire (Because Really, Who Wants That?)
1. How to: Resist the urge to use gasoline-powered glue pots.Answer: Stick to the electric kind, my friend. Much less chance of a fiery surprise.
2. How to: Not store flammable liquids next to your flammable woodworking supplies.Answer: Think of your workshop like a bad neighborhood. Flammables don't play well with others.
3. How to: Make sure you have a working fire extinguisher.Answer: Because you never know when a rogue glue pot or an overzealous lighter might decide to throw a fire party.
4. How to: Check your fire alarms. Are the batteries dead? Are they chirping incessantly at 3 am?Answer: A working fire alarm is like a good friend - it might annoy you sometimes, but it'll save your life in a pinch.
5. How to: Learn from history!Answer: Don't let Seattle's fiery faux pas become your own.
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