Macy's: A Vertical Village
So, you're wondering how many floors Macy’s in NYC actually has, huh? Well, buckle up, because this is about to get deep.
The Never-Ending Story
Let’s start with the obvious: Macy’s is a vertical village. It’s like a small city where instead of streets, you have escalators. And instead of neighbors, you have shoppers. But let’s get real for a second. Trying to count the exact number of floors is like trying to count the number of grains of sand on a beach while wearing a blindfold and mittens.
The Official Count (or is it?)
According to the official Macy’s PR team, there are 11 floors. Eleven! That's like saying the ocean is only knee-deep. I mean, have they been to Macy’s? There’s gotta be at least a few secret underground levels where they store all the extra sale racks and the mythical unicorn section.
The Unofficial Count (the real one)
Let’s be honest, who actually counts floors in Macy’s? By the time you reach the third floor, your brain has turned into mush from all the decision-making. And don’t even get me started on the basement. It's like a labyrinth of endless shoe options and discounted home goods. It could be 2 floors, it could be 20. Nobody knows.
The Mezzanine: The Floor-and-a-Half
And then there’s the mezzanine. Is it a floor? Is it half a floor? Is it a purgatory for lost shoppers? The world may never know. But one thing’s for sure: it’s where you go to contemplate your life choices while surrounded by overpriced handbags.
The Bottom Line (or should I say, the basement line?)
So, how many floors is Macy’s? It’s complicated. It’s like trying to measure the size of the universe. Or your appetite after Thanksgiving dinner. It’s big, it’s overwhelming, and it’s full of stuff you probably don’t need but will buy anyway.
How-To Macy's Survival Guide
- How to survive Macy’s: Bring comfortable shoes, a fully charged phone, and a sense of humor.
- How to find what you’re looking for: Give up and buy something else.
- How to avoid spending all your money: Don’t go. (Just kidding, kind of.)
- How to navigate the basement: Bring a map and a flashlight.
- How to enjoy your Macy’s experience: Focus on the free samples.
