How Many Freemasons Are Actually in Texas? A Deep Dive (or Not)
So, you wanna know how many Freemasons are in Texas, huh? Well, buckle up, because we're about to embark on a thrilling journey into the world of secret handshakes, cryptic rituals, and men in funny hats. Or maybe not. Let's be honest, I'm not really sure where this is going either.
The Great Texas Freemason Mystery
Texas is a big state. Really big. Like, really, really big. It's got everything: cowboys, oil, and apparently, a whole lot of Freemasons. You'd think counting them would be as easy as counting cattle, but nope. These guys are like the elusive Loch Ness Monster - everyone’s heard of them, but nobody's actually seen a clear picture.
There are those official numbers, of course. Something about 110,000+ Masons spread across 889 lodges. But let’s be real, those numbers are probably as accurate as a politician's promise. Who knows how many secret handshake clubs are operating out of someone's garage? Or, you know, the back room of a barbecue joint?
The Secret Society of BBQ Lovers?
I mean, think about it. Freemasons love their rituals, their secret codes, and their fancy handshakes. Sounds a lot like a barbecue enthusiast, doesn't it? Maybe the real secret to Freemasonry isn't world domination, but the perfect brisket rub.
So, How Many Freemasons Are Really in Texas?
The short answer? We'll never know. The long answer? It's probably more than you think. But let's be honest, the real question is: who cares? Unless you're planning a surprise Freemason-themed party, knowing the exact number is about as useful as knowing the exact number of grains of sand on a Texas beach.
In conclusion, the world of Freemasonry is shrouded in as much mystery as a good conspiracy theory. So, while we might never know the exact number of Freemasons in Texas, we can appreciate the intrigue and the fact that it gives us something to ponder while we're enjoying a nice, juicy steak.
How To... Become a Freemason (Probably)
- How to find a local lodge: Check online directories or ask around. Just don't knock on random doors looking for a secret handshake.
- How to prepare for the initiation: Practice your poker face and learn to keep a secret. Also, don't wear your tin foil hat.
- How to order a Masonic apron: Online, of course. Or maybe you can borrow one from your neighbor.
- How to master the secret handshake: Practice in front of a mirror. And don't forget to wink.
- How to maintain secrecy: Join a support group. Or just pretend you're an alien.