How Many People Were on the Baltimore Bridge? A Tale of Numbers and Nonsense
So, you're wondering how many people were on the Baltimore bridge when it decided to take a plunge into the chilly waters of the Patapsco River? Well, buckle up, because this is going to be a wild ride through the land of numbers, speculation, and a whole lot of "I don't know."
How Many People Were On The Bridge In Baltimore |
A Bridge Too Far?
Let's be honest, the exact number of people on the bridge at that fateful moment is a mystery wrapped in an enigma, sprinkled with a dash of chaos. It's like trying to count the grains of sand on a beach while being chased by a particularly enthusiastic seagull.
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The bridge was under construction, which means it was probably crawling with hard hats and safety vests. But then, there's the whole "middle of the night" thing, which tends to thin out the crowd a bit. So, was it a bustling construction zone or a ghost town? Your guess is as good as mine.
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The Great Bridge Census
Some reports say there were eight people on the bridge, but let's be real, those are just the ones we know about. There might have been a secret society of bridge-dwelling trolls, or maybe a family of raccoons who had set up camp in one of the support beams. We'll never know.
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The truth is, counting people on a bridge at 1:30 in the morning is like trying to count the number of stars in the sky while having a staring contest with a particularly bright streetlight. It's just not happening.
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Let's Get Hypothetical
If we were to take a wild guess, we could say there were probably somewhere between zero and a million people on the bridge. That covers all the bases, right? Or, we could go for a more scientific approach and say that the number of people on the bridge was directly proportional to the number of donuts consumed by the construction crew that morning. But let's face it, that's probably not going to help us solve the mystery.
In conclusion, the exact number of people on the Baltimore bridge when it decided to take a swim is a question that will probably haunt us forever. But hey, at least it gives us something to talk about at parties, right?
How To...
- How to become a bridge inspector: Develop a fear of heights, a love for paperwork, and a knack for spotting tiny cracks.
- How to build a bridge that won't collapse: Hire engineers who actually know what they're doing.
- How to avoid being on a collapsing bridge: Carry a lucky rabbit's foot and a crystal ball.
- How to turn a bridge collapse into a positive: Start a GoFundMe for a new bridge, and offer boat tours of the wreckage.
- How to avoid talking about the Baltimore bridge collapse: Change the subject to the weather.