How TF He Like You? Decoding the Mystery of Real Boston Richey's Love Life (Spoiler Alert: It's Probably Money)
Let's face it, folks. We've all been there. Scrolling through Instagram, sipping that lukewarm cup of regretful decisions you call coffee, and BAM! There he is. Your ex, all boo'd up with some mystery woman who looks like she could afford a whole new public housing project with a swipe of her black card. Naturally, your inner monologue explodes with the timeless question: How TF he like you?!
Well, settle in, my friends, because today we're diving deep into the enigmatic world of Real Boston Richey's taste in women, deciphering the code that has left us all scratching our heads harder than a lottery winner with a sudden case of amnesia.
Theory #1: The Power of the Purse Strings
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Let's be honest, the lyrics in Richey's banger, "How TF He Like You," aren't exactly subtle. "Brand new you, me, brand new us. Somethin' ain't addin' up" rings through our ears like a financial advisor desperately trying to warn us about a bad investment. This theory suggests that Richey, the self-proclaimed "Prince of Bub" with a penchant for Goyard bags (fancy way of saying expensive luggage, folks), might be more impressed with a woman's bank statement than her banter.
Sub-theory: Is it Love or Retail Therapy?
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Now, before we all write Richey off as a shallow dude (although, the jury's still out on that one), consider this: maybe he's just showering his lady with gifts because that's his love language? Like, his way of saying, "You complete me... and also, here's a credit card with no spending limit." Hey, if diamonds are a girl's best friend, who are we to judge a man who speaks the financial equivalent?
Theory #2: The Opposites Attract Hypothesis
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Maybe, just maybe, Richey is a hopeless romantic deep down. Maybe he's tired of the gold-digging groupies and craves a down-to-earth woman who appreciates the finer things in life, like, you know, a decent cup of coffee that doesn't taste like regret. This theory is a bit far-fetched, considering the lyrics also mention "buyin' a brand new bitch a brand new butt," but hey, a man can dream, right?
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How Tf He Like You Boston Richey |
The Verdict: ¯_(?)_/¯
Honestly, folks, the real reason Richey likes his mystery woman is anyone's guess. Maybe it's love, maybe it's financial codependency, maybe it's a combination of both and a whole lot of therapy waiting to happen. The important takeaway here is this: whoever she is, she's living her best life, and that's something we can all respect.
FAQ: How TF to Get Richey's Attention (Assuming You Actually Want It)
How to Become a Master of Materialism? This might not be the healthiest approach, but hey, if it works for Richey's current squeeze... Just remember, you gotta work that designer handbag like it's an extension of your personality.
How to Develop a Sudden Interest in Public Housing? Brush up on your knowledge of urban planning and social inequality. Bonus points if you can name all the districts in Boston.
How to Master the Art of the Side-Eye? Because let's be real, Richey probably throws a lot of shade. You gotta be able to return serve, honey.
How to Perfect the "I Woke Up Like This" Look... But Actually Spend Hours Getting Ready? Because looking effortless takes effort, duh.
How to Develop a Thick Skin? The internet can be a cruel mistress, especially when you're dating a guy who brags about buying people new body parts.
Remember, this is all for entertainment purposes only. There's probably a much nicer guy out there who appreciates you for you, even if you can't afford a Goyard bag.