Craving Thorns? Here's Your Guide to Catching the Game Today (Because Dishes Can Wait)
Let's face it, folks, Thursday nights were practically made for Portland Thorns soccer. The stadium's electric, the scarf game is on point, and who doesn't love watching Tobin Heath nutmeg an opponent like they're a traffic cone? But hey, not everyone can make it out to Providence Park. Fear not, fellow Thorns fanatics! This handy-dandy guide will have you cheering on our roses in no time, all from the comfort of your couch (or bathtub, no judgement).
Calling All Prime Timers:
Is your idea of a perfect night kicking back with a cold beverage and some Prime Video action? Then you're in luck! Tonight's Thorns game is being broadcast live on Prime Video, so fire up that subscription and get ready to cheer. Pro tip: pair the game with some delicious locally-brewed cider for a truly Portland experience (responsibly, of course!).
Channel Surfing Champions:
Maybe you're more of a traditional TV buff. No worries! The Thorns have you covered. Depending on your location, you might be able to catch the game on ION or CBS. Do a quick channel scan or check your local listings to see if you're in luck.
Tip: Compare what you read here with other sources.
The Streaming Struggle is Real:
Listen, we've all been there. Cable? What's that? But fear not, cord-cutters! There are still ways to get your Thorns fix. If you're in the US, you can stream the game live on Paramount+ or NWSL+. NWSL+ is your one-stop shop for all things Thorns (and the rest of the NWSL), so if you're a die-hard fan, this might be the move for you.
International Thorns Fans Unite!
For our Thorns fans rocking the green and gold from across the globe, fret not! NWSL+ is also available for international viewers. So grab your favorite jersey (and maybe a translator if commentary isn't in your language), and join the virtual Thorns army!
Tip: Reading twice doubles clarity.
Bonus Tip: Don't forget the snacks! Popcorn, chips, guacamole, the options are endless. Just make sure you have enough to last the whole game, because you won't want to miss a single second of the Thorns' magic.
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| How To Watch Portland Thorns Game Today |
Thorns FAQs: You Asked, We Answered (Kinda)
How to find out where the Thorns are playing?
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Check the National Women's Soccer League website or the Thorns FC website for their full schedule.
How to deal with my significant other who isn't a soccer fan?
QuickTip: Pause to connect ideas in your mind.
Distract them with delicious snacks and promise to help with the dishes later. Works like a charm (sometimes).
How to convince my pet to wear a Thorns bandana?
Bribery with treats might be your best bet. Just be sure to get photographic evidence!
How to avoid spoilers on social media if I can't watch the game live?
QuickTip: Ask yourself what the author is trying to say.
Mute keywords like "Thorns," "goal," and Tobin Heath's name. You're welcome.
How to channel my inner Thorns player after the game?
Practice your footwork, bust out some victory dances, and wear your Thorns scarf with pride. You got this!
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