So You Want to Know About the Oklahoma City Bombing? (Hold the Detonator, Buddy)
The Oklahoma City bombing of 1995 was a dark day in American history. Thankfully, most of us wouldn't know the first thing about planning an explosion (unless your idea of a bomb is a rogue can of baked beans after Taco Tuesday). But buckle up, history buffs (and those who are curious but maybe not looking to get on the FBI's watchlist), because we're about to take a wacky trip down a very un-explosive memory lane.
How Was The Oklahoma City Bombing Planned |
The Mastermind (Not Exactly a Genius)
Timothy McVeigh, our bomber-in-chief, wasn't exactly Professor Moriarty. This disgruntled ex-army dude was fueled by anger at the government's handling of Waco and Ruby Ridge (think cult standoff and heavily armed standoff, respectively). So, his plan to "stick it to the man" involved... a Ryder truck? Not exactly the height of criminal sophistication.
Tip: Reading twice doubles clarity.
Acme Products Presents: The Fertilizer Fiasco
Apparently, McVeigh wasn't down with fancy, high-tech explosives. No, sir, he opted for a concoction of fertilizer, diesel fuel, and who-knows-what-else, lovingly (and dubiously) referred to as a "farmers' bomb." Let's just say it wasn't exactly advertised in Farmer's Weekly.
Tip: Highlight sentences that answer your questions.
The Great Escape (That Wasn't So Great)
Imagine McVeigh's surprise when, after parking his explosive surprise and strolling off like a whistling milkman, he realized he forgot the most important part: the getaway car was out of gas! Karma, much?
Reminder: Focus on key sentences in each paragraph.
The Aftermath: When Kaboom Goes Wrong
The bombing was a horrific tragedy that claimed the lives of 168 innocent people. McVeigh's plan, fuelled by anger and ignorance, resulted in a devastating loss of life.
Let's Not Do That Again: A Totally Serious FAQ
Tip: Patience makes reading smoother.
Alright, alright, so you probably don't want to be Oklahoma City Bomber 2.0 (yikes). But humor us for a sec with some hypothetical, totally-not-serious FAQs:
- How to Make a Bomb (Safely): Don't. Seriously, don't. Call a plumber if your pipes are clogged, not MacGyver.
- How to Channel Your Anger : Therapy. Take up knitting. Bake a stress cake (and then eat it all, because yum).
- How to Get Along with the Government (Even When They Drive You Nuts) : Vote. Write letters. Channel your inner lawyer and debate them logically. Blowing things up is a big no-no.
- How to Rent a Truck Without Looking Suspicious: Be polite. Pay upfront. Maybe don't mention your weekend plans involve a "farmers' market."
- How to Learn from History: Read books! Watch documentaries! Ask questions (like the awesome ones you just did)!
Remember, kids: Violence is never the answer. Especially when it involves poorly planned truck bombs.