Bridge Over Troubled Water (or Not)
So, let’s talk about bridges. Not the kind that connect two people with deep emotional bonds (though that's a whole other can of worms), but the kind that connect two sides of a river. Specifically, let's talk about the one in Baltimore that decided to take a plunge.
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| What Happened On The Baltimore Bridge |
A Bridge Too Far?
You know when you’re having a really bad hair day and you just want to throw in the towel? Well, imagine being a bridge. You've been standing there for decades, doing your job, connecting people, cars, and even the occasional confused goose. And then, one fine day, a big ol' cargo ship decides you're looking a bit too smug and rams right into you. Talk about a bad hair day!
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The Day the Bridge Went Swimming
Now, this wasn’t just any bridge. This was the Francis Scott Key Bridge, a Baltimore landmark. It was like the Eiffel Tower of Maryland, only with less tourists and more traffic jams. So, when it decided to take a dip in the harbor, it was a bit of a shock to the system, to say the least. People were like, "Wait, what? Bridges can swim now?"
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The whole thing was a bit surreal. Imagine being in your car, happily cruising along, and suddenly, the road beneath you starts to tilt. Next thing you know, you’re doing a cannonball into the drink. Not the most glamorous way to start your day, right?
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A Fish Out of Water
Thankfully, most people managed to escape with their lives, though I'm sure their dry cleaning bills were astronomical. But can you imagine the fish? Just minding their own business, swimming along, and suddenly, there's a giant chunk of concrete and steel crashing down on them. It's like the ultimate underwater obstacle course.
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So, what's the moral of the story? Well, for one, don't mess with bridges. They're grumpy and they have feelings too. Secondly, if you ever find yourself in a car that's about to become a submarine, try to remember your swimming lessons. And finally, fish in Baltimore are probably still recovering from the shock.
How To... (Bridge Edition)
- How to avoid being on a collapsing bridge: Unfortunately, there's no foolproof method, but avoiding rush hour and staying informed about weather conditions can help.
- How to become a bridge construction expert: Start with a solid foundation in engineering and physics. Then, spend countless hours studying bridge designs and construction methods.
- How to build a bridge out of toothpicks: Gather a lot of toothpicks, some glue, and a steady hand. Patience is key!
- How to avoid becoming a human cannonball: Steer clear of collapsing bridges and avoid jumping off tall buildings.
- How to help fish recover from a bridge collapse: While you can't directly assist them, supporting clean water initiatives and responsible fishing practices can contribute to their overall well-being.
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