Who Do the Houston Texans Play Next? A Burning Question for the Ages
So, you're wondering who the Houston Texans are gearing up to face next? Well, buckle up, buttercup, because we're about to dive into the thrilling world of NFL scheduling. Or as thrilling as it can get when you're talking about preseason football.
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| Who Does Houston Texans Play Next |
Preseason Pain or Promise?
Let's be honest, preseason football is like watching paint dry, but with slightly more athletic people. It's a time for teams to experiment, rookies to shine (or not), and fans to pretend they know what they're talking about.
Who's on the Texans' Preseason Menu?
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- Chicago Bears: The Texans will kick off their preseason with a trip to the Windy City to face the Bears. Think of it as a warm-up, like stretching before a marathon. Except, you know, without the actual running.
- Pittsburgh Steelers: Next up, the Texans head to the Steel City to take on the Steelers. This one could be interesting, especially if either team decides to unleash their secret weapon - a punter with a cannon arm.
- New York Giants: The Texans return home to host the New York Giants. This is where things start to get real. Or as real as preseason football gets. Expect plenty of punts, field goals, and questionable play calls.
- Los Angeles Rams: The final preseason game pits the Texans against the Rams. This could be a good chance to see if the Texans can hold their own against a Super Bowl contender. Or, you know, they could get blown out. It's a coin flip.
Regular Season: The Real Deal
Okay, now we're talking. Preseason is over, the real football is about to begin. The Texans' first regular season game is against the Indianapolis Colts. It's a divisional matchup, so you know it's going to be a bloodbath. Or at least, as close to a bloodbath as football gets without actual blood.
How to...
- How to survive the preseason: Stock up on snacks, adult beverages, and your favorite form of distraction.
- How to impress your football-loving friends: Learn the difference between a slant and a screen. And for extra points, master the art of the fake punt.
- How to prepare for the regular season: Start practicing your touchdown dance now. Just in case your team surprises everyone.
- How to avoid disappointment: Lower your expectations. It's worked for me so far.
- How to enjoy the game: Remember, it's just a game. Unless you're a fantasy football player. Then it's life or death.
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