Who Won The Houston Game Today On Tv

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Who Won the Houston Game Today? A Tale of Triumph or Tragedy

So, you're wondering who won the Houston game, huh? Well, buckle up, buttercup, because this might get a little complicated. First of all, we need to clarify which Houston team we're talking about. Are we talking about the Astros, who swing bats like they're auditioning for the next Marvel movie, or the Texans, who tackle people for a living?

Astros or Texans? A Crucial Question

If it's the Astros we're discussing, then chances are you're either a die-hard fan or you've accidentally stumbled upon this post while searching for "cute cat videos" (no judgment). The Astros, being a baseball team, play games that last about 3 hours, unless they're playing the Yankees, in which case it's an all-night affair. To find out if they won, your best bet is to check a sports news website or app. Or, you could try asking your smart fridge. I hear they're getting pretty good at keeping up with sports scores.

Texans, Texans, Texans

On the other hand, if you're interested in the Texans, those gridiron gladiators, then the situation is slightly different. Football games are shorter, but they're also more likely to end in a tie, which is basically the sports equivalent of a stalemate. So, if you're wondering if the Texans won, you might want to prepare yourself for a potential let-down. But hey, at least you can enjoy the commercials.

Where to Find the Score

If you're still unsure about which team you're rooting for, or if you're just too lazy to figure it out, here's a general rule of thumb:

  • Baseball: Check MLB.com or your preferred sports app.
  • Football: Check NFL.com or your preferred sports app.

And if all else fails, just ask your neighbor. They probably know.

How to...

  • How to avoid sports withdrawal: Find a new hobby. Preferably one that doesn't involve screaming at a TV.
  • How to impress your friends with sports knowledge: Learn the difference between a home run and a touchdown.
  • How to survive a sports argument: Agree to disagree, or change the subject to something less controversial, like politics.
  • How to bet on sports: Consult a financial advisor first.
  • How to watch a game without getting stressed: Drink plenty of beer. (Disclaimer: Excessive alcohol consumption is harmful to your health.)
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