Why Doesn't LA Have a Subway? A Tale of Cars, Sprawl, and Stubbornness
Los Angeles. City of Angels, City of Dreams, and City of Endless Traffic. You'd think a place with such lofty aspirations would have figured out public transportation by now, right? Wrong. So, why is it that while New York has a subway system that could rival the circulatory system of a giant squid, LA is still stuck in traffic? Let's dive in.
The Great LA Sprawl
First things first, LA is not your typical city. It's more like a sprawling, suburban beast that decided to call itself a metropolis. Neighborhoods are spread out like confetti on a windswept beach. Building a subway system would be like trying to connect the dots on a particularly chaotic coloring book.
The Car Cult
Let's face it, Angelenos have a love affair with their cars. It's not just about getting from A to B; it's a lifestyle. Cars are status symbols, symbols of freedom, and, apparently, a way to avoid small talk with strangers. Building a subway would be like trying to break up a long-term, toxic relationship.
The Money Pit
Building a subway is no cheap date. It's like buying a mansion, furnishing it, and then maintaining it for the rest of your life. And that's just the beginning. LA has shown a remarkable ability to spend billions on transportation projects that either never get finished or, when they do, don't actually solve any problems. It's like buying a lottery ticket every week and never winning.
Political Gridlock
LA is a city of neighborhoods, each with its own unique set of priorities. Trying to get everyone to agree on a subway route is like herding cats while wearing roller skates. By the time they figure out where to put the first station, the city will have doubled in size.
So, What's the Future?
While a full-blown subway system might be a distant dream, there's hope. LA is slowly but surely expanding its light rail network. It's like starting with a tricycle and hoping to eventually upgrade to a rocket ship. And there's always the option of teleportation, right?
In the meantime, here are some tips for surviving LA traffic:
- Learn to meditate: It's essential for your sanity.
- Invest in a good audiobook: Something long and captivating.
- Embrace carpooling: Make friends with your fellow traffic victims.
- Consider a bike: If you're feeling adventurous.
- Move to a city with a subway: Just kidding (kind of).
How to...
- How to survive LA traffic without losing your mind: Practice deep breathing, listen to podcasts, and avoid rush hour if possible.
- How to convince your friends to carpool: Offer to be the DJ or provide snacks.
- How to find the best route to avoid traffic: Use a traffic app and be flexible with your travel times.
- How to appreciate the irony of living in a car-centric city with terrible traffic: Find humor in the absurdity of it all.
- How to dream of a world with efficient public transportation: Close your eyes and imagine a stress-free commute.
