Can't Take the Man Outta Chicago
They say you can take the boy out of the city, but you can't take the city out of the boy. In the case of Chicago, it's more like, "You can take the man out of Chicago, but you can't take the man out of Chicago." Trust me, it's a subtle but crucial difference.
The Windy City Within
I've tried, believe me. I've lived in places with palm trees, mountains, and even oceans. But no matter where I roam, a little piece of the Windy City always tags along. It's like having a tiny, pizza-loving, deep-dish-obsessed roommate who never pays rent.
For instance, my morning coffee ritual involves a shot of espresso, a splash of half-and-half, and a silent prayer for the Cubs. And don't even get me started on my love for hot dogs with everything on it. I mean, who needs ketchup when you have mustard, relish, onions, tomatoes, peppers, celery salt, and a pickle?
Deep-Dish Devotion
Let's talk about deep-dish pizza. It's not just food; it's a lifestyle. I've had people tell me that it's too much sauce, too much cheese, too much crust. To them, I say, "Have you even lived?" It's like comparing a hot dog to a gourmet sausage - sure, they're both meat, but one is clearly superior.
Chicagoan to the Core
I've embraced the local customs wherever I've lived, but there's always a Chicago twist. I've tried surfing, but I kept looking for potholes in the waves. I've gone hiking, but I packed a hot dog and a six-pack. And when I tried meditation, all I could think about was the L train.
So, yeah, you can transplant a Chicagoan, but you can't erase their roots. It's like trying to remove a deep-dish stain from a white carpet. It's possible, but it's a lot of work, and there's always a chance it'll come back.
How to Spot a Chicagoan
- How to spot a Chicagoan in disguise: They order pizza with a knife and fork.
- How to survive a Chicago winter: Embrace the layers, invest in a good coat, and find a cozy spot by the fireplace.
- How to order a Chicago hot dog: Everything on it, except ketchup.
- How to appreciate deep-dish pizza: Lower your expectations for speed, and raise your expectations for flavor.
- How to become a Chicagoan: Learn the words to "Go Cubs Go," eat plenty of Italian beef, and never complain about the weather.